Dailyquotes 2010¼

[abomvubuso.livejournal.com]

Hi, everyone! I'm sure you remember the talk_politics 2009 Daily Quotes list. It was fun!

So i guess its time to open the new one for 2010, right?

I'm hereby announcing the beginning of the new Daily Quotes list, which of course, as the name suggests, will be updated daily.

There are no certain requirements for finding yourself in it. Whenever someone makes a remark that inspires others to either have a laugh or go into deep contemplation, chances are that it'll get in here. (Sorry, insults dont qualify). ;)


On a second note, please welcome our new, fifth co-moderator, htpcl . I'm sure most of you know him well already. We trust he'll maintain the Balance in the Force, while helping us to do an even better job.

K'thx for the attention, and have a nice weekend everyone!
Let's Talk Politics. :)


The Dailyquote list for the 1st quarter of 2010 starts behind the cut (now with links)...



100
"These rich parasites that have been living high off of the labor of the masses will soon face a reckoning of moderate leftist propositions."
(sgiffy)

"I found a black hole in my closet this morning. I think it ate all the empty hangers."
(devil_ad_vocate)

"Me, i have the nobel peace prize. I have like twenty. I am the Michael Phelps of peace. Very long arms"
(mcpreacher)

"One man's wingnut is another man's President."
(policraticus)

"If you go down this path again asserting that I ought to let my own child die in order to save 5 other people, I'm promise you that I will figure out a way to punch you in the nose through the internet."
(malasadas)

"I love how Hitch always looks like he's one deep breath away from leaning over and puking up 6 double scotches, 3 kamikaze's, and a tray of party wieners."
(blorky)

"Hey, isn't that the point of making LJ posts? Bringing up stuff we'd never agree on anyway."
(htpcl)

"This is the other part of Jesus' message: treat others as they seem to want to be treated."
(vox_diabolica)

"You have not experienced Shakespeare until you have read him in the original Klingon."
(enders_shadow)

"Oh, I love rice. I'm a diehard rice-ist."
(kardashev)

90
"Underhand toilet roll hangers must die."
(anfalicious)

"Half of Obama is racist against the other half."
(debergerac)

"Honestly, I think all arguments should be based on anecdotal experience rather than on incidents based on partial evidence."
(geezer_also)

'Thinking is the hardest work there is, which is the probable reason why so few engage in it."
[Henry Ford]

"When your argument appears to hinge on the precise semantics of "not very good" versus "sucks", it might be time to reconsider your argument."
(dzlk)

"In Soviet Russia, men jump off cliffs to escape Stalin. This is called socialism."
(root_fu)

"Why don't the poor have food? Because you won't let me give them yours."
(mrbogey)

"For sale: Large hole in ground near Waxahachie, Texas; complete with numerous office buildings once planned as a Super Collider center for scientific research in the U.S.; never used - make offer."
(devil_ad_vocate)

"Food stamps are a small price to pay for fat, happy poor people."
(debergerac)

"Bronze Age? Anyone meeting up with the 9th Spanish Legion using bronze weapons would find themselves very dead, very fast. Also, they would be shocked to find themselves 500 years in the future."
(policraticus)

80
"It's not polite to pick on the retarded kid."
(surferelf)
"But there are thirty retarded kids in the classroom and they're trying to make us all retarded."
(puf_almighty)

"I believe that everything is only six seconds old."
(meus_ovatio)
"I can't prove you wrong, it must be true!"
(the_rukh)

"I supposed getting badly sunburnt is something that one could reasonably attribute as something inherently "white". Although that's not really "acting" per se."
(mrsilence)

"I was thinking about becoming more bigoted, sexist, and generally just plain intolerant. But I guess I just don't like being lonely."
(allhatnocattle)

"All I see is some crazy whackadoos going on about some jibber jabber."
(mrbogey)

"Santa is overrated. He never brought me that Porsche and I was such a good kid during the year."
(mahnmut)

"We are both a social and a predatory species. We evolved morality to deal with that."
(eracerhead)

"I'm against LSD use because it always ruins music festivals and camping trips."
(meus_ovatio)

"I hold an irrational belief that Texans and dinosaurs lived at the same time - and then humans came later."
(fizzyland)

"A hypocritical hypocrite in an assembly of hypocritical hypocrites accuses his fellow hypocrites of hypocricy."
(ygrii_blop)
"Welcome to American politics."
(kardashev)

70
"Hitler was a vegetarian, but he hunted the trickiest beast known to man."
(kko)

"I used to be reflexively against hunting. Then I grew up."
(malasadas)

"Diet Coke is my drink of choice. I'm still waiting for a party."
(ytterbius)
"I'll form that party with you as long as our manifesto includes being awesome and wearing silly hats on Fridays."
(chemchick)

"At the rate we're going, owning old Gray Nintendo light guns may end up sending you to jail for 10-20 or life."
(l555l)

"Criminal would imply a law was broken. What laws has this Senator broken?"
(verytwistedmind)
"Thou shalt not be a dickhead."
(enders_shadow)

"88% of people agree that vague CNN poll is vague."
(squidb0i)

"I always get pwned when i post charts'n'graphs but still... Here you are then."
(abomvubuso)

"So the better you are... the better you become... and the better you'll always be? Sounds borked."
(confliction)
"Pretty basic rule of evolution though."
(the_rukh)

"Round pegs and square holes work perfectly well -- with a large enough hammer."
(malasadas)

"I don't mind disagreeing with you agreeably, but I do dislike agreeing with you; but the last just may be the solution."
(geezer_also)

60
"It's called "education". You can get some at your local library. And by the way it's much more powerful if you take it along with a heavy dose of this stuff called "reality"."
(dzlk)

"A man's driving a car and hits a woman, whose fault is it?"
(enders_shadow)
"Depends on the length of her skirt."
(airiefairie)

"Its the beginning of the end when the high-context inside jokes start being more commonplace than the trolls."
(the_rukh)

"If you're livin' high on that cheap credit hog, don't look for a cure from the hair of the dog."
(brucenstein)

"People who use Bronze-Age scriptural texts to inform their spiritual views are superstitious. People who use Bronze-Age scriptural texts to inform their scientific views are fucking morons."
(drcruel)

"Colbert is parodying Beck. And Colbert is playing for humor. Beck is serious."
(dwer)

"We have the Reagan Era to thank for a really cool Genesis music video."
(cgallivan)

"Technological progress is one thing. Assuming you would be priveleged enough to enjoy that progress is quite another."
(mercystars)

"First rule of the History Channel-it's entertainment. Any resemblance to history is purely accidental."
(underlankers)

"I just whizzed all over the back fender of your car and told someone about it afterward. Conspiracies rock."
(op_tech_glitch)

50
"Just like the over-used terms such as "socialism", "troll", etc, which tend to lose of their value the more often they're mentioned, so does the excessive use of macro pictures make them lose their funniness."
(htpcl)

"Terrorism is everybody's friend. Quit bogarting it."
(meus_ovatio)

"In a bad mood we'll drink your wife, borrow your scotch and have a very tough time trying to fuck bang your golf clubs."
(enders_shadow)

"An ability to acquire information, coupled with an inability to correctly process it, leads to stupid ideas."
(sgiffy)

"I have a dream... where ducks won't be judged based upon their appearance.. or the color of their feathers."
(root_fu)

"Look in the mirror. If it walks like a duck and quacks like a duck and floats like a duck, then it's a duck."
(gunslnger)

"Rainbow fish are awesome down under."
(l555l)

"Al Gore is smart if he is right about global warming. And if he is wrong? - He's a fucking genius."
(oportet)

"If making jokes about the holocaust and 9/11 has taught me one thing, it's that it's always too soon."
(anfalicious)

"To me, the surest proof that there are no gods is that none of them have yet emerged to smack their followers around."
(drcruel)

40
"Well, clearly voting for women is on the table. I mean could you imagine Sarah Palin voting if she couldn't look at her hand first?"
(tridus)

"I find that heavy whipping cream and baking soda helps my rage to cohere."
(puf_almighty)

"Hugo, I go, we all go for Hugo."
(debergerac)

"The sun never sets on the American empire. There is no such thing as "overseas" when it comes to America."
(sophia_sadek)

"Rejecting an ad for the Superbowl because it is "stupid" is a little like rejecting potato chips because they are crunchy."
(malasadas)

"I'm against other people voting. They weaken my power."
(allhatnocattle)

"Hunting is illegal in our city, but people do it anyway. Usually it's only other humans they hunt and they rarely eat their prey."
(sophia_sadek)

"If it's yellow, let it mellow. If it's brown, flush it down."
(gunslnger)

"That whooshing sound you just heard was you running out of ways to try to squirm out from under your errors."
(malasadas)

"Reagan made me nervous. He's like the dentist that tells you that dentists make him nervous because most of them love inflicting pain."
(readherring)

30
"Cynicism is one of the more constructive consequences of age."
(udoswald)

"I don't know if you're aware, but gay men are more closely related to rabid wolverines than humans. It has to do with the number of toes or something."
(brucenstein)

"Hippies never die: they just move to Afghanistan."
(sophia_sadek)

"I may not agree with your obesity, but I will defend with my life your right to be fat."
(root_fu)

"You do know that infinite growth is impossible, don't you? "
(underlankers)
"You obviously haven't seen my penis."
(lucazzo)

"You're not counting college girls."
(gillen)
"I'm trying, but it's taking a while."
(gunslnger)

"The Republicans really stuck it to Obama this week. Now they have a 41 to 59 majority in the senate."
(jimb)

"I was going to make a post about this myself, but I can't do it now without titling it "And now, a post about today's ruling that wasn't made by a complete moron," and I think that might violate a community rule."
(reflaxion)

"People can die of mouth infections caused by poor oral hygiene. People don't die because of accents unless you're in a Mel Brooks movie."
(mcpreacher)

"Just when I thought I was finally over shooting people with my Jesus Gun and dropping little Bibles on their corpses as a calling card, you start posting again to remind me of how much fun it was."
(prader)

20
"I'd hate to think our relationships with other countries boil down to nothing more than a cost-benefit analysis. We may as well wall ourselves in and then pat ourselves on the back for being 'efficient' with our friendships."
(reality_hammer)

"It's a shame your LJ is in Russian - it is Russian, right? - or I'd friend you in a heartbeat."
(inibo)

"I want to see a steel-cage fight to the death match-up with Glenn Beck, Bill O'Reilly and Rush Limbaugh in it.
If Obama shat bricks of gold that he then gave to the American people as a gift, those three would call him evil for it."
(enders_shadow)

"Be more Australian."
(vox_diabolica)
"I just tossed a boomerang at a dingo and bounced it off an abo and a roo before quaffing a Foster's. What more d'ya want, mate?"
(op_tech_gitch)

"If Gandhi took meth, he wouldn't be Gandhi."
(the_rukh)

"This world is full with self-consumed assholes. And Twitter is just another tool to facilitate their douchebaggery."
(abomvubuso)

"The European part [of Russia] is basically useless. Full with crazy people and very few resources. Whereas the Asian part is the reversed: full with very few people and the whole crazy periodic table."
(htpcl)

"Capitalism helps the poor like McDonalds helps fat people."
(enders_shadow)

"The sad thing is that everyone is [insert own country]-centric, and too few people bother to look at an issue from all sides before talking."
(mahnmut)

"What we really need is a stop terrorists program which is merely a way of hiding the population reduction initiative."
(yahvah)

10
"Rich people do bad things. Therefore, if we outlaw rich people, bad things won't happen."
(blorky)

"If I have seen far, it is only because I am standing on the shoulders of a 50-foot giant standing in a 500-foot hole."
(spaz_own_joo)

"The biggest lesson of history is that anyone who predicts the future is full of shit until it happens. "
(underlankers)

"OMG I can't find Israel anymore on Google maps!"
(thies)

"Do you guys have some kind of bat signal that lets you know when someone says "Russia" on the internet???"
(malasadas)

"I find it best not to upset the lower castes; if you guys get too angry, you won't build my pyramids for me later on."
(vox_diabolica)

"Could you please filter this through the American AM Radio Broadcast Filter, so I can care about it? Also, could you please simplify some of [the] names so I can ignore that they are from different countries?"
(malasadas)

"With the responsibility of representing my country out of the way, i will now feel free to make an authentic ass of myself."
(pmax3)

"I can write my name in the snow in 9 languages before my piss runs off."
(abomvubuso)

"Did you know that females don't have enough of that enzyme which dissolves alcohol? Connect the words drunk+chick and you got all kinds of scenarios."
(htpcl)

Comments

[badlydrawnjeff.livejournal.com]

I, for one, welcome our new htpcl overlord.

[the-rukh.livejournal.com]

What is his political stance he's representing?

[abomvubuso.livejournal.com]

He says Beer Party, but actually all his statements show Centrism (or as you might call it, Third Way).

[the-rukh.livejournal.com]

He dabbles in the hardstuff too, huh.

[geezer-also.livejournal.com]

Centrist to the rest of the world, but to (some of) us in the U.S. he's just another lefty :P

[abomvubuso.livejournal.com]

I heard thirdwayers (lol, what a word) equally disagree with your lefties and righties.

[geezer-also.livejournal.com]

I confess "thirdwayism" is an entirely new concept to me, so I have no idea what their beliefs are.....on the other hand I'm not sure what his beliefs are either, and perhaps "beer party" does sum it up best :D

[abomvubuso.livejournal.com]

At the end of the day, the political convictions of a staff member are a factor, but definitely not the most important one. I'd say, not even in the top-5.

[htpcl.livejournal.com]

Beer party is pretty centrist IMO. Actually the ideal centre, since when you start to see double, left & right seem the same to you. (Not that they're not the same anyway).

[allhatnocattle.livejournal.com]

Dyscordians should stick apart.

[htpcl.livejournal.com]

We're doomed OMGZ.

[allhatnocattle.livejournal.com]

We are? The revolution will save us.

[mahnmut.livejournal.com]

One and a half too many :-)

[htpcl.livejournal.com]

I guess they intend to exploit me because of the different time zone. ;(

[htpcl.livejournal.com]

Good. So I won't have a lot of work, while I'll still have a medal. (They do give medals, right?)

[yahvah.livejournal.com]

I've been without internet since the 11th and am glad to be back and see I'm in the list of obsessors. It's about time to start beating the dead horse of correct constitutional interpretation again.

[mahnmut.livejournal.com]

Rant on, brotha!

[pmax3.livejournal.com]

Centrist? Cool! My kinda guy :D (Actually both left and right ideologies seem absurd when carried to their logical conclusions so I find comfort in the center. May that's just because I'm too lazy to research harder) D:

[htpcl.livejournal.com]

You and I. We're of the same breed.

[paft.livejournal.com]

"Sorry, insults dont qualify"

Sure they don't.

[abomvubuso.livejournal.com]

Issue addressed, thanks.

quote 92

[enders-shadow.livejournal.com]

"You can't appreciate Shakespeare until you've read him in the original Klingon." -- General Chang

fuck, that means the quote is actually mine cause I changed a word.
d'oh!