Daily quotes list.
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talkpoliticsJust for the purposes of the archive (will be updated frequently).
Daily quotes on talk_politics.
Daily quote:
"My theory is that your theory is not just as valid as my theory. If your theory involves my theory being valid..."
(enders_shadow)
"Americans like to have really big refrigerators and they like to put all kinds of stuff in there."
(majortom_thecat)
"Unless it's in the Deep South. In which case, those big refrigerators sit on the front porch waiting to be fixed one day."
(kardashev)
"Everyone knows that the 1970s didn't end until ABBA broke up."
(malasadas)
"I think you should be banned from being cloned. One of you is nine too many."
(vox_diabolica)
"The best part about conspiracies is that they're unnecessary since you can always trust people to do the dumbest fucking thing."
(mcpreacher)
"You'd be amazed how much clearer the world looks when looked at through the bottom of an empty bottle."
(htpcl)
"I am for any holiday that has as its symbols a fat man with magic reindeer and a mischievous baby that breaks into your house."
(sqiffy)
360
"Once something has been approved by the Government, It's no longer immoral."
[Rev T. Lovejoy]
"Don't worry. The lefties will start posting in this thread too once they wake up and recover from their drug-fueled sex orgies. It's hard to get out of bed after a night of Romanesque debauchery, you see."
(kardashev)
"If alien civilizations were looking for places to establish contact with intelligent species they'd take one look at our Congress and scratch this planet off the list."
(reality_hammer)
"I can't fathom why those who put healthcare for others at the top of their list of important things, moreso than anything else, aren't donating almost all of their disposable income to helping their fellow man. I figure it's just greed on their part."
(mrbogey)
"What's with all the sudden hate-on wrt realpolitik? Shit, I thought we were unabashed in our pride for such a strategem. Christ, we only killed how many thousands of Cambodians over it. I, for one, am proud of this crowning achievement."
(meus_ovatio)
"I like people who carry guns. Makes me feel safe. You know, in the event that I ever need a gun, I just have to take it from some wannabe chump who doesn't know the first thing about gun control."
(meus_ovatio)
"Your mistake is in assuming that there are actually people on the other side of the internet from your computer screen."
(malasadas)
"Arcasm? That sounds like some sort of electrically induced moment of pleasure."
(anfalicious)
"America probably isn't the best nation on Earth. But you're free to leave it to go live in the best nation on Earth. That counts for a lot."
(mrbogey)
"I think the state has an inalienable right to get in the kitchen and make me a sammich before I pimp slap it with mah sneaker."
(kardashev)
350
"If it bleeds, I can kill it."
(prader)
"[Self pwnage] doesn't matter if the pwnage depends on the community looking at it."
(panookah)
"Think about the children! Do you want them to eat crab? What if both their parents are shellfish-eaters? That potentially makes all their children shellfish-eaters too!"
(htpcl)
"Ayers = marxist -> Marxism -> Socialism -> Anti-Christianity -> Evolution -> Nazis -> Japanese -> Asians -> China -> Opium -> Afghanistan -> Osama. Ergo Ayers = Osama bin Laden."
(a_new_machine)
"If you make a desert, yes, that's peace, but it is the peace of the graveyard."
(underlankers)
"Optimists proclaim we live in the best possible world, pessimists fear they are correct."
(prader)
"OK let's keep shitting into our own pot while pretending that shit falls from the sky and not from our own ass - until the pot is full of shit and there's nothing left to eat."
(ddstory)
"Just tax the poppies. Instant solvency."
(a_new_machine)
"Fear is a factor which can make humans act surprisingly rational."
(underlankers)
"It's a shame that literacy tests were such a racist tool of oppression."
(drcruel)
340
"The best way to defeat [uninformed opinions] is to demonstrate in a consistent and sensible way how stupid and uninformed they are. Yelling at their author what a douchebag he is, usually earns you nothing - except the revelation in front of others that, perhaps, you're no different than the douchebag in question."
(abomvubuso)
"I contend we are both atheists, I just believe in one fewer god than you do. When you understand why you dismiss all the other possible gods, you will understand why I dismiss yours."
[Stephen F. Roberts]
"Rome was founded by a pair of unwanted bambinos: the Cain and Abel of Seven Hills."
(sophia_sadek)
"Feces in hand? Cry havoc! And let loose the poo of war!!!"
(the_rukh)
"I've always had a hard time trying to understand why people take pride in something they have nothing to do with."
(ddstory)
"Yes, the error is correct"
(htpcl)
"If only there was some way we could just take all that money the people who are disposed towards investment have, and give it to the people who are disposed towards making impulse purchases on credit, that would be great!"
(prader)
"Do you see being Asian, black,or homo-sexual as being the same?"
(geezer_also)
"Yes. They are essentially unchangeable qualities of people. Unless you are Michael Jackson."
(thies)
"I pledge vehemence to the flag of the United States of America, Incorporated, and to Republicans who I can't stand. One nation thinks it's God, unapproachable, with the best liberty and justice money can buy. Amen."
(ygrii_blop)
"That is the cutest, most huggable, lovable, story ever. Its like a lil' kitten, too cute to disprove."
(root_fu)
330
"Sorry, have to go. I'm going to meet a few oppressed Bulgarian women who I intend to force to consume considerable amounts of alcohol and salads, and later possibly dance with me in the disco."
(htpcl)
"An economist will know tomorrow why they were wrong today about a prediction they made yesterday."
(mahnmut)
"Two wrongs don't make a right, but three rights make a left."
(the_rukh)
"We're Americans. We can't possibly admit that other countries can be better than us at anything, because then it might turn out that the universe really doesn't revolve around us after all, and we don't have the Wellbutrin reserves to deal with that concept yet."
(reflaxion)
"Just load the jury pool with tea party activists and then remind them that President Obama wants a conviction in this case. It would have the added benefit of a number of them dropping dead from the stress of not knowing whether or not to fry the terrorists or give Obama the finger."
(malasadas)
"The length of a discussion is in a straight correlation to the stupidity of the OP, and in a reversed correlation to the length of said OP."
(abomvubuso)
"I've heard some tribes in Papua New-Guinea have a protocol of making their visitors crawl before their "emperor"."
(htpcl)
"Huh, I guess Biden did kind of mysteriously disappear, didn't he?"
(fleaplus)
"Yeah, he became vice-president."
(masterific)
"[The countdown display on the apocalypse cake] It's signaling we're one second away from a hippie-vegan meltdown? I see an upside."
(fizzyland)
"One would hope they would have contingency documents/positions/etc for just such an event where the Emperor (heh) could give a quick, broad answer and provide details later."
(reality_hammer)
320
"Children who have critical thinking skills are a total pain in the ass."
(schquee)
"Q. Is it just me? A. No, the cow that jumped over the moon was actually blue."
(geezer_also)
"I'm now confused about the extents to which the term 'troll' has stretched nowadays. I guess it's the new 'socialism' on the Nets."
(mahnmut)
"Things could be learned through failure, too. Preferably someone else's failure. Stupid people learn from their own mistakes. Smart people learn from others' mistakes."
(abomvubuso)
"I for one, embrace our degenerate Mandarin masters and their sweet, sweet Orange Chicken."
(fizzyland)
"I'm a multi-tasked weapon of mass alcohol depletion."
(htpcl)
"Teenagers haven't got fully developed minds yet and their skulls are still too soft to retain information. They just imprint from their surroundings until they reach maturity or, failing that, become Randians."
(vox_diabolica)
"For your next post, you should debone an entire duck."
(malasadas)
"Nothing comes free but the cheese in the mouse trap."
(htpcl)
"Intelligence sounds like a good quality too yet there is a joke about "military intelligence" being an oxymoron."
(kunaifusu)
310
"Italics have a known liberal bias."
(dwer)
"And bolds are self-sufficient fat conservatives. Everybody knows that."
(mahnmut)
"I assume you'd deny any effort by the government that would include increasing literacy for children. Its okay, we don't expect you to competently express your opinions."
(ironhawke)
"Republicans aren't as colorful as the Democrats when it comes to election-rigging, but there's a ruthless effectiveness in it that you can't help but respect."
(surferelf)
"You can't have honey without tar. It's not interesting."
(mahnmut)
"I give you the tar, i'll take the honey. Be entertained, leave to me the art of being bored but full."
(abomvubuso)
"Cynicism is healthy for the nerves. Let the idealists blabber their nonsense, then die young."
(mahnmut)
"Give me a Hanzo sword and I can reform the government over the course of two movies!"
(fizzyland)
"My point is so much more important than everyone else's that it must have its own post separate from the main thread on the topic, so that everyone can see how amazing and wonderful I am."
(reflaxion)
"I get all my news from political cartoons and billboards. My granny died after Nobama threatened her with a pig. Read my blog."
(mcpreacher)
"Some would argue that sex is not physical harm, but what do I know about sex..."
(mahnmut)
"It's all about who you know and who you blow."
(panookah)
"Let's not bring Chicago politics into the discussion."
(debergerac)
300
"Somehow you manage to take subjects on which you and I should agree and make me not want to agree with you. You have a gift."
(udoswald)
"You're asking me to read something from lewrockwell.com? I think I'd rather remove my own pancreas with a rusty grapefruit spoon."
(malasadas)
"The fist bump originated as a Masonic secret handshake."
(sophia_sadek)
"Stop whining Russky, we've got our own problems-and while you're here, could you spare a few barrels of oil?"
(acesspadesdice)
"Sadly a 3 minute segment on utter nonsense is not unique to fox news."
(sqiffy)
"Sadly Fox isn't limited to 3 minutes of utter nonsense."
(kinvore)
"The world would be better off if we all got our political views from singing puppets."
(mighty_carrot)
"It's ok for black students to be racist, because they aren't white."
(cgallivan)
"You keep on keeping on. Someday you'll learn, or expire. Even odds on which is first."
(dwer)
"I want to know how you do a reenactment of the Cold War."
(devil_ad_vocate)
"You glare at each other a lot, occasionally punch a bystander, and then go home."
(reflaxion)
"At some point you go from clever advertising to the equivalent of a three year old yelling loudly at the mall."
(sqiffy)
290
"Now imagine that 70 years later a bunch of questionably qualified people on the internet debate the imaginary outcomes furiously, eventually relying on stock, sound bite replies provided by long forgotten professors or anonymous bloggers."
(malasadas)
"When Germany drives alone, it drives with Hitler!"
(mcpreacher)
"The military is only a projection of policy, and policy is driven by economic interests."
(htpcl)
"It's Canadian Thanksgiving and Columbus Day, far fewer North Americans are fucking around on the internet."
(mijopo)
"We friggin Africons and them bloody Eurotards do compensate for it to some extent."
(mahnmut)
"7 comments to a comment commenting on the number of comments to a mod post, the fuck?"
(the_rukh)
"Political satire became obsolete when Henry Kissinger was awarded the Nobel Prize."
[Tom Lehrer]
"I advise all good libs to become breatherians. It's the socially reponsible thing to do."
(debergerac)
"Sending an egg there is like sending a Democrat to backwoods West Virginia: nobody knows what's going on, but the locals are smiling in a distinctly unpleasant way."
(a_new_machine)
"Money gets you through the times of no freedom better than freedom gets you through the times of no money."
(abomvubuso)
"I thought this was talk_politics, not real_solutions_for_real_problems."
(prader)
280
"True knowledge is gained by honest intellectual reflection. Not by trying to stockpile talking points."
(panookah)
"I think creationists are all the proof we need that evolution just ain't happening."
(op_tech_glitch)
"I don't think there is a way to "win" in Afghanistan. I'm not even sure what winning means for us or them."
(rhomea)
"I just can't understand why people in your country are so freaked out. I really can't. This is like some kind of animation movie where everyone's screaming and jumping around like nuts. It's extremely funny and creepy at the same time."
(htpcl)
"If we killed every poll about killing, then we're just hypocrites for killing those who say they'd kill, even though no killing has yet been done by the killer we're killing!"
(abomvubuso)
"Let's face it, okay? The U.S.A. is like a candy bar. It's full of nuts."
(ygrii_blop)
"The Jews already own the world. Why would they want to nuke it?"
(debergerac)
"We are launching a thriving glassworks industry and that's a very quick way to avoid paying skilled artisans."
(malasadas)
"[Kretek] is clearly a first amendment issue. how else will smokers of cloves be able to express their complete and utter snobbish lameness?"
(socialdarwinism)
"Maybe some president should pass a big spending bill that includes lots of construction project money that the republicans froth at the mouth about socialism over."
(the_rukh)
"Frankly I think you all are nuts, but that's very possibly due to my age, conservatism, and legalism.....so carry on."
(geezer_also)
270
"Your wild flailing at putting together wild theories would help us right now, our air conditioning is out right now, as we could use the breeze generated by you."
(404)
"I am joe biden irlbiden IRL. ... There's not much for me to do so I just sit in the senate hoping nobody realizes I don't wear pants while I blackberry."
(mcpreacher)
"[You] would have most likely been shot and the body would have been hidden. At least that's what I was told would happen to me if I got too close to anybody's marijuana patch in northern CA."
(majortom_thecat)
"Flaming gay thugs heat up the atmosphere!"
(thies)
"One man's bullshit is another man's fertilizer."
(reality_hammer)
"If you could prove the existence of God with science, what you would prove is that he is not God."
(policraticus)
"We're a superstitious lot. Which is why Young Earth Creationism, moon landing deniers, 9/11 Truthers and Birthers all get such traction in this country."
(fizzyland)
"I'm convinced [Kanye] is an alien. Check out the crop circles on his head."
(soliloquy76)
"I hear the tinkling of broken glass. It's someone's lol-o-meter."
(ddstory)
"Attack the source. The easiest way to make an issue disappear. "You lie!" Poof. Problem solved."
(ddstory)
"What do young atheists care about?"
(horsdumonde)
"The same things as theists, minus one."
(mahnmut)
260
"[9/11] was a shocking event that will forever change American political discourse, those directly affected, and the countless bumpers of moron's automobiles."
(kko)
"I thought about sending the GWB Library a packet of geranium seeds. They would look nice planted in a painted tire out on the front lawn."
(devil_ad_vocate)
"Dear People of Zimbabwe, I'm right in between cleaning out my belly button and taking a long nap, but please feel free to wake me up when you strike oil. Sincerely, Uncle Sam."
(jblaque)
"White people do poison colored communities."
(socialdarwinism)
"Correction...rich people poison poor communities."
(l555l)
"Sometimes I get into these weird moods where I think people are actually interested in figuring out what is true rather than just scoring points according to their own, strange, rating systems."
(ed_rex)
"Actually [Obama] was too busy eating kittens and left the speechwriting to the last moment."
(the_rukh)
"I don't want barack obama ordering MY CHILD to make him a macaroni birth certificate so he can continue hoodwinking AMERICA! no sirree bob!"
(mcpreacher)
"Talking of health care is what makes me dizzy. P'haps i should go see a doc."
(abomvubuso)
"So are you saying it wasn't ok then and and isn't now, or that it was ok then since it is now, or are you being hypocritical?"
(the_rukh)
"If I'd president I'd just declare everyone must think happy thoughts. Then disband the military since we'll be at peace. And we can grow food. And since food is free it's good that we can pay the farmers... and stuff."
(mrbogey)
250
"I have a whole finger I'd be glad to give to Mr. Rice."
(op_tech_glitch)
"Is it because you Liberals go around harvesting them from Conservatives (via your teeth)?? "
(consortofvenus)
"We get em from taxes."
(mcpreacher)
"Do not deprive [US people] of [the] opportunity to hate and fear whatever country they've made the irrational choice to hate and fear."
(mahnmut)
"If everyone would agree that college football, viewed in HD on a large screen TV is a right, not a privilege then I'd be happy."
(reality_hammer)
"I despise moneyed interests using their cash and their power to do whatever they want and who fucking cares what happens to people."
(xforge)
"You do realize this describes politics, right?"
(brucenstein)
"Obama's poll numbers are excellent. Its the people taking the polls who suck."
(root_fu)
"Apparently the Japanese communist party has been gaining members at 1000+ a month for quite some time now, so it's only a matter of time. I hope it works out well for them and I believe it will."
(kko)
"Global warming should be taken completely out of the realm of politics...and turned over to religion."
(devil_ad_vocate)
"You'll have to pry my thumbscrews and testicle crushers from my cold dead fingers!"
(devil_ad_vocate)
"Any good manager (which is effectively what politicians are) knows that they are only as good as the people who work for them."
(mrsilence)
"Permanent friendship doesn't exist. Just temporary benefits and fragile networks of interests. A common principle of big-scale geopolitics."
(htpcl)
240
"If Beck could organize his thoughts into some coherent form - preferably with an ability to spell - and reach a conclusion beyond: "We're going to transform into something!", I might believe he is a rational human. Until then, it's: Argle, argle, bipitty boo, sumpin jumped out of my butt, and itz gonna scare you!"
(devil_ad_vocate)
"Look now, you got me so confused I tried to put my shoe on my head and my hat on my ass."
(htpcl)
"[79% is] considered a very low percentage in the Fox parallel universe. One could easily call it a minority, even."
(mahnmut)
"Those who pervert the past by applying the arbitrary details of them to each political point they either oppose or support are pieces of shit."
(new_wave_witch)
"Thanks for further illustrating that you're a loose rush of watery shit."
(ygrii_blop)
"A lot of conservatives who are actually able to use their brain must be feeling pretty embarrassed these days."
(ddstory)
"If I chant "It's just a not-so-elaborate troll" and click my heels three times, will it go away?"
(speciesofspaces)
"Will you all please stop talking about healthcare and post something on a topic I actually know something about so that I can make an intelligent comment?"
(pmax3)
"Democracy [is] a great concept for a people-driven system, frequently ruined by the fact that most people are complete idiots."
(reflaxion)
"Looks like screaming gibberish like a retard is after all the best way to do politics."
(thies)
230
"I think the 'mental retardation' part could be problematic for anyone with real responsibility, ie, not just a mouthpiece."
(squidb0i)
"First of kudos to the President for using the word pittance! That's like using whilst. You just don't get to do that every day!"
(verytwistedmind)
"If you use enough bold words, exclamation posts, and race cards in your posts, does it really invalidate the concept of doctors advocating unnecessary procedures in order to make a larger profit? And can I apply this technique to other arguments, too?"
(reflaxion)
"If socialism is the new 'N' word I think Microsoft Word (and all Microsoft 2007 programs) should be considered some racial pejorative."
(verytwistedmind)
"Politics is greed disguised as morality."
(allhatnocattle)
"Four years is a long time to gut the economy."
(reality_hammer)
Wouldn't gut it any more than our defense budget, mein herr."
(mcpreacher)
"I see no reason for the administration to fret about pleasing people who are insane."
(devil_ad_vocate)
"Chances are, purely statistically, that you'd end up on the side of the colonized rather than the colonizator. Well, at this point you apparently are not (not that you'd have internet access to complain about it on online forums, if you were)."
(mahnmut)
"The true measure of tyranny is to be a tyrant that does nothing tyrannical."
(underlankers)
"I've got my heart set on being a member of one of B. Hussein O.'s Death Panel. I hear it'll include a 401k match. Ads out soon!"
(speciesofspaces)
220
"I got accused of being a racist because I voted for McCain, so saying "look at the pot calling the kettle black".... Just seems like it might be crossing a line or hurting a feeling."
(__birdie__)
"Guys, i strongly recommend you take a deep breath, perhaps drink a glass of cold water (or two glasses), or lemon juice if you prefer; then go out and have some fresh air; meet some friends, have a beer; then maybe you'd return to this conversation if you like. You'd be amazed by the effect of the above-mentioned activities."
(abomvubuso)
"C'mon people, if freakin' Tumnas can shoot a bullet out of mid-air on the fly in "Wanted," I don't see how we can't just lob missiles randomly and expect them to stop hundreds of carefully-aimed, computer-guided warheads."
(a_new_machine)
"In fact that's got to be the most unintentionally funny things I've ever read, and I've read Twilight."
(kinvore)
"Everyone's free to spout whatever ridiculous bullshit they care to."
(squidb0i)
"But they can't stop you from crossing your arms as hard as you can."
(kadeshaderow)
"Jesus Christ, guys, chill out, [Obama] won't give anybody healthcare, you can still safely assume poor people will die for no reason. life goes on."
(mcpreacher)
"I'm afraid you've just outed yourself as a resident of the fake America. In real America, Palinite is a widely understood dialect."
(theminaoflife)
"People should stop thinking they're so goddamn clever for being able to yell 'godwin' whenever they see the word 'nazi' or 'hitler' on the fucking internet."
(mijopo)
"Maybe the Left's Karl Rove, from his base underneath the low carbon emission volcano, has managed this one."
(l555l)
"Bill O is a talk show host, not a politician, any one who takes his word as gospel is as stupid as those who believe the middle class will not be taxed."
(__birdie__)
210
"Both Stewart and Colbert should make an altar to the likes of Beck and sacrifice fruit to them every day in gratitude for being provided ample material to do their shows on a daily basis. It is a win-win scheme for all of them."
(airiefairie)
"You are fat irl and your whiteness makes it not as charming."
(mcpreacher)
"How did this country go insane?"
(ygrii_blop)
"A black guy lives in a white building."
(mylaptopisevil)
"My philosophy is that even one who still claims the Earth is flat does not deserve having insults hurled at them, but I have recognised long ago that I am a minority in thinking so."
(airiefairie)
"A well thought out post with a passionately argued point illustrated in great detail? There is no way anyone is going to pay attention to this."
(panookah)
"Can I blame Marilyn Manson for negatively influencing the Israeli's? How about Grand Theft Auto West Bank?"
(root_fu)
"The economy is not as important as a black man being arrested and released."
(the_rukh)
"Democrat Death Squads are being dispatched to your location, please remain where you are and prepare to be liquidated for the greater good."
(fizzyland)
"When Obama finally caves to pressure from birthers in the name of bipartisanship and unveils his birth certificate, it better be notarized by Jesus himself or there will be blood."
(squidb0i)
"Yes pie > politics, I think everyone can agree with that. Except for those who like cake, but we have the moral high ground because Hitler liked cake, too."
(kinvore)
200
"I have no reason to believe you aren't sure of your opinion, but ultimately it's not very useful."
(the_rukh)
"As Mark Twain said, the truth is stranger than fiction, but it because fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities. Truth isn't."
(the_rukh)
"Today we commemorate the death of the coverage-of-the-death of Michael Jackson."
[Stephen Colbert]
"Wikipedia is 110% accurate. It's so accurate that if it's ever "wrong" then it's easily provable that it's actually reality that's wrong"
(smokngoat)
"I know I'm not surrounded by idiots. Idiots are just the loudest and most obnoxious members of society."
(panookah)
"If you people on the left would stop watching and/or listening to the "Right wing fanatics" their ratings would go down and they would soon be off the air."
(geezer_also)
"Please keep the Communism meme up. Each misuse of the word dilutes its meaning until it becomes meaningless."
(soliloquy76)
"You mean like the non-started communist dictatorship that Obama is about to non-start?"
(ddstory)
"Nope that one is already in process."
(hunterkirk)
"Rights are a stupid human construct. The only rights you ever have are the ones you can defend."
(flagg2ptoh)
"Are you the type of person that takes medicine for a headache then gets pissed off your headache didn't go away an hour before you took the medicine?"
(the_rukh)
190
"Europe would not have disintegrated had Moscow been nuked. But we would have."
(robert_johnson)
"Fascism is paramilitary nation-statism."
(underlankers)
"There is no good or evil. Only actions we paint as having those motivations. And Hitler."
(l555l)
"Religion is not necessary for us to exist but that says very little about how valuable it can be."
(pantsu)
"Watching the left unleash all of its hysterical, hate-filled wrath at Governor Palin is all people need to witness to understand how regimes like Nazi Germany came to be."
(reality_hammer)
"I wish [Palin] would present her birth certificate so we could settle this business about her being born in Kenya."
(allhatnocattle)
"All that Europeans are allowed to talk about is soccer, fashion, food and sex (like anyone in America cares about these)."
(airiefairie)
"Hur hur teh librul mediaz heart Oblahma an he shud be sendin gunz 2 Iran."
(squidb0i)
"Dramatic exchanges of stupidity sound as if they can be (albeit barely) legitimized by sheer entertainment value"
(lady_eclectic)
"At the rate Obama's going, [Palin] will quite possibly win."
(badlydrawnjeff)
180
"God forbid the pre-election polls ever correctly predict who is going to win an election!"
(ddstory)
"I am as horrified at the notion of civil authorities forcing women NOT to wear burqas as I am at the notion of religious authorties forcing women TO wear burqas."
(dartmouth05)
"Where is the sword in your life? What do you seek to accomplish with the crude instrument of Caesar?"
(sophia_sadek)
"Argentine girls: they'll fuck you up."
(prog_expat)
"The British are like the rest of the Europeans? Who knew."
(mahnmut)
"Recently I experienced how banks are exploding this in not honest way and driving people in financial whole."
(r_frigg)
"I am clearly the most intersting thing that has happened in this community ever"
(acesspadesdice)
"Schools should be free to teach reality and not be held hostage to whatever silly fairy tales you have invented."
(sqiffy)
"I am amazed at how people are trying to judge every country by their own standards of democracy."
(southwest)
"Trade in your trinity today and you get all five pillars for the price of one god! Guaranteed zombie free! Its a deal that will blow you away!"
(sqiffy)
170
"Do not hurry to judge a nation you don't know the whole story about."
(mahnmut)
"You didn't just backpedal, you moonwalked!"
(squidb0i)
"There are idiots everywhere, you cant deal with them by becoming like them, cos by that standard, you're the next target."
(abomvubuso)
"Why would an oligarchy be a bad thing? I believe in a ruling class as long as I am part of it."
(verytwistedmind)
"Ideological alignment trumps the desire for quality.
(Ultimus Mahnmutus)"
(mahnmut)
"Forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those that trespass against us."
(allhatnocattle)
"I believe after Vietnam no one really had the stomach to do anything about SE Asia"
(lordtwinkie)
"You can't "damage" something that has a primary attribute of "change"."
(gunslnger)
"Using people as a means to achieve an ends is never an appropriate action."
(pantsu)
"Naw I am just the kind of person who questions assumptions of others and goes against conventional wisdom.... I call it thinking outside the box."
(hunterkirk)
160
"I've come to question the existence of the planet Venus altogether. Wasn't it invented by the Pagans in the first place? What do those fools know. After all, they didn't worship Jesus."
(sophia_sadek)
"What if his karma ran over his dogma?"
(underlankers)
"Can you think of anyone who has done more to promote the cause of al Qaeda than the Bushites?"
(sophia_sadek)
"Yes, Al Qaeda."
(thies)
"Those crazy Eskimos....must be global warming warming up their blood up there."
(underlankers)
"[The reptiloids] want to enslave us because they need to exploit our resources (read: huge quantities of poo, and who produces the most of it? guessed right - those who are scared shitless!)"
(mahnmut)
"I, like most people, am not well-versed in all the tenets of libertarianism."
(valknott)
"I can sum it up for you: Free will. Non-aggression. Bestiality."
(soliloquy76)
"Our political philosophies are not aligned."
(bebopmonkey)
"Obama's multi-sexual. Everyone wants him."
(szeretni)
"Whats the cube root of Jesus expressed in the form of interpretive dance? I dont think science can get that one."
(mahnmut)
"What the Hell is a Latina woman?"
(underlankers)
"According to the supreme court it is someone of the female gender who votes for Democrats and has a Hispanic surname."
(reality_hammer)
150
"I've come to fucking despise contemporary political discourse and have chosen to withdraw from it to maintain my sanity."
(bord_du_rasoir)
"ALL-LOL or ALL-AH? Methinks you're a terrist..."
(ghoststrider)
"Praise LoLah! May many lols be upon him."
(cgallivan)
"No one really likes to take an honest look at demographics. It reveals so many unpleasant realities."
(reality_hammer)
"I think the Russians and Israels have pretty much debunked the "girls can't fight" myth."
(reality_hammer)
"Sulu demands explanation for this gawdamn bullshit!"
(op_tech_glitch)
"There has to be something to keep the rest of us interested in between the Democrat/Republican retardation that goes on."
(panookah)
"Your historic references are as relevant as a corset on the 2009 Academy Awards ball, or the duel code in a 21st century California high school."
(mahnmut)
"Incarceration is a torture too, I invite anyone who thinks it is not to stay in prison."
(kunaifusu)
"I first assume that everyone lies out of the side of their mouth, then I look for some evidence that they're NOT lying."
(valknott)
"A Mormon shall be President of the United States when a Jew will lead the American Nazi Party."
(underlankers)
140
"The biological purpose of sex is still procreation no matter what secondary purposes it may be utilised as."
(pantsu)
"Self-delusion is not a prerogative of the religious only. But they often come hand in hand."
(abomvubuso)
"If centrism were the answer, McCain would have been perfect."
(justgoto)
"I sense that if you scratch a libertarian you'll find an anarchist."
(policraticus)
"When the realities of the world come crashing down on puny man's politics it soon ceases to be about right and wrong. All that remains afterwords is necessary and unnecessary."
(panookah)
"I should probably warn you that President Obama is currently preparing to send a gang of imbeciles to break in to YOUR psychiatrist's office, and search for personal psychiatric records which can be used to discredit you. The methodology has improved since President Nixon's day."
(henry_kissinger)
"I imagine the vehicle of the future being powered by electricity, produced from nuclear fusion, and stored in highly efficient batteries."
(airiefairie)
"It's only ironic if you buy into the man-made climate change hypothesis."
(reality_hammer)
"Or if you buy into those other pesky scientific facts like gravity, evolution and genetics."
(telemann)
"What is the violent crime rate of returning solders compared to that of any Democrat control city? Bet you your next years income it is far lower."
(hunterkirk)
"I like lobsters. Do the gay lobsters taste differently from the straight lobsters?"
(airiefairie)
"There's a bit more crunch due to the glitter."
(evil_admiral)
130
"Don't make me come over there and Godwin you."
(reality_hammer)
"I rooned your servay."
(soliloquy76)
"Of COURSE Obama's a liar. He's the President of the United States."
(gillen)
"Can you imagine what would happen to a herd of gazelle if they all slowed down to help the lame ones? The lions would eat better that's for damn sure."
(flagg2ptoh)
"Obama's Right-wing by any standard except the American standard."
(underlankers)
"If people worked instead of sitting around in cafes then maybe something would improve around here."
(panookah)
"Bonus irony points for saying this whilst sitting around in a cafe talking about politics."
(tcpip)
"China has a significant naval force and it is getting larger every year."
(reality_hammer)
"Good for them. We wish them good luck with invading the world."
(mahnmut)
"How do you LOL a horse-donkey hybrid off? Don't tell me, I don't want to know..."
(underlankers)
"So...what precisely did the Democrats do [in 100 days]?"
(underlankers)
"Same thing they try to do every day, Pinky: try to take over the world."
(soliloquy76)
"I think the most attractive thing in a person is partisan gloating and an undeserved sense of accomplishment. Especially when people seem to think that they have won something along the lines of the super bowl when their party of choice wins a majority, and or some election somewhere."
(panookah)
120
"See, there's another reason [Specter] doesn't belong in the Republican party: he has a sense of humor."
(soliloquy76)
"And he's attracted to women. So he's always been a Democrat at heart."
(allhatnocattle)
"Inside every Latvian is a Russian yearning to be free."
(debergerac)
"Environmentalists have been complaining about human over population."
(hunterkirk)
"Just give me control of all US money and you won't have to worry about it anymore."
(mahnmut)
"What can an Indian do on a post? Dancing and stripping."
(airiefairie)
"But hey, its politics. It brings out the worst in people."
(strbjun)
"A Middle Eastern country is our ally during the time between when we give them weapons, and when they start using them."
(Stephen Colbert)
"One of the parties in our two party system is bad? Now that I can get behind. I would hate to have to sit down and analyze things with the realization that both parties have their merits and flaws. Thank god for democracy."
(panookah)
"Whatever happened to true federalism? When did we as Americans start thinking so little of the sovereignty of the states? Maybe some poeple just live in shitty ones or something."
(panookah)
"Don't have to be a super power to perform leadership."
(the_rukh)
110
"If revealing the actions of the Bush administration makes the Bush administration look bad, then it's really the Bush administration that makes the Bush administration look bad."
(bertro)
"[Sarkozy] is French. I'm already disgusted with him."
(ghoststrider)
"People tend to get hysterical and irrational at times of difficulty, but on the other hand, their true nature is revealed in its full."
(mahnmut)
"You might be surprised but piracy has been known long before the Disney ride and its namesake films."
(kunaifusu)
"It's a sad day for America when Fidel Castro is more willing to work with the President of the United States than any member of the Republican leadership."
(rumorsofwar)
"When I grow up I wanna be you, only still looking like me. You get the point."
(verytwistedmind)
"This entry alone is seriously making me wonder why I even try participating in civil discussion here."
(pantsu)
"Because you cant resist the temptation?"
(abomvubuso)
"If the South can't handle driving with two inches of snow on the ground I doubt they've got the Civil War 2.0 in them."
(dv8nation)
"People should be allowed to hunt [Liberals] down freely and make necklaces out of their eyes."
(mahnmut)
"Eastern European LJ-ers use LJ for other things than talking nonsense and having silly little quarrels like most of us do."
(airiefairie)
"I think they just take their nonsense and silly little quarrels a lot more seriously."
(gunslnger)
100
"Mexico should provide financial aid and military training to the United States to help combat our gang problems."
(the_rukh)
"Your posts always make me feel like I'm in the Twilight Zone."
(pantsu)
"Don't touch that dial!"
(sophia_sadek)
"Fear makes people do stupid things. Like signing bail out bills before they are actually read."
(verytwistedmind )
"You must realize that this thread will be used extensively in future flame wars to throw people's words back at them - screenshots are probably being made after every comment."
(vacant_thomas)
"Reading, you're doing it wrong."
(kinvore)
"I'm not trying to read it properly. I'm trying to troll."
(panookah)
"As goes California so goes the nation. Unfortunately in this one instance direct democracy failed to do the right thing."
(panookah)
"Obama cured the great depression. Biden was there, he knows."
(debergerac)
"Who's concerned about the poor? I'm concerned about health care! The poor are helping pay for it. About time! Don't forget the added benefit of them dying sooner and not being a drain on the treasury after they retire."
(verytwistedmind)
"Contemporary figures of speech seems like a pretty feeble thing to worry about, IMO."
(new_wave_witch)
"Too many people want vengeance instead of justice."
(dwer)
90
"I sense a disturbance in the Force. There's been a resurgence of hit-n-run posts on TP."
(abomvubuso)
"Statistically speaking, the world's got to end sometime, and when it does, thousands of paranoid survivalists will emerge from their holes, triumphantly pumping their knock-off AK-47s in the air, screaming "I told you so!" just before the blast-wave hits and wipes out them, us, and all of their useless stockpiled ammunition out of existence."
(rumorsofwar)
"Are Democrat Failures on the Economy Emboldening the Terrorists? You decide!"
(rumorsofwar)
"But only crazy libertarians want to legalize pot...."
(gunslnger)
"Which is more important the USA or the Constitution?"
(hunterkirk)
"That's like asking "what's more important, my TV or the user manual?""
(mijopo)
"What changes would the US need to make in order to meet the requirements for membership, so that the EU could accept the US?"
(ddstory)
"Adopt UK spelling."
(abomvubuso)
"The invisible hand of the market fixed it with lollipops and moon dust. Of course you don't know, its invisible and responsible for anything good that happens to our economy."
(the_rukh)
"[In prostitution] There's plenty of exploitation to go around. It's basically a bunch of guys paying pretty girls to pretend to like them."
(kinvore)
"First they brought us lower gas prices now they are turning more women into strippers and hopefully adult ‘actresses’. I am seriously considering changing parties."
(verytwistedmind)
"Too often people use religion as an excuse for problems that are deeper than that."
(nairiporter)
80
"You often forget about the politics and make the argument more about the character of the person you are arguing with."
(pantsu)
"Its a slippery and easy road which many people tend to take when confronted with an opposing, and equally firm position. Its like two particles smashing against each other at the speed of light - you get all various kinda crazy stuff out of it."
(abomvubuso)
"I am reasonably certain that the world has a nearly unlimited capacity to not care what happens to Africans."
(malasadas)
"Stop trying to take away my God given right to label people based on their relation to my own narrow political positions. Dick."
(awful_jackass)
"Never underestimate the degree to which the modern American principal is a giant quivering nutsack in perpetual fear of being sued."
(malasadas)
"Anyone have a copy of the definition of war handy?"
(l555l)
"War is whatever you can get away with."
(babystrangeloop)
"Unicorns were eating Captain Crunch in my frontyard with James T. Kirk. - Prove it. - Guilty until proven innocent?"
(bord_du_rasoir)
"The idea of a Discworld populated by level-headed and colourite people appeals to me much more than a Roundworld full [of] dull round-headed deluded people who believe that they are great thinkers, which status gives them the authority to preach to others whatever nonsenses they deem appropriate (for themselves)."
(airiefairie)
"[Obama & Gordon Brown] should do wife swapping."
(verytwistedmind)
"Have you seen Sarah Brown? *shudders*"
(prog_expat)
"Pressing [search keyword: Obama]. Results: N/A. Pressing [search keyword: Limbaugh]. Results: N/A. Running away, crying."
(ddstory)
"Behind Chuck Norris' beard is a third fist."
(reality_hammer)
"His cock's on his chin? LL Cool Chuck!"
(vee_ecks)
70
"How do I hide part of my entry behind a link? What is an lj-cut?"
(ddstory)
"Can Canada have Maine? It'd cut down my driving time between Toronto and Fredericton significantly."
(tridus)
"Russians don't drink wine. They drink vodka. Like water. Literally it comes out of their taps. Well the ones that can afford indoor plumbing. Some hafta pump the vodka out of a well in the yard."
(lordtwinkie)
"But those failed economics are failed! Clearly the failed policies of the failed administration of the failure Ronald Reagan fail to stimulate!"
(reality_hammer)
"What do you think is a just way to process those who confess to murderous thoughts?"
(sophia_sadek)
"Treat em with kindness, compassion and let them join the Democratic party."
(debergerac)
"You can make a far better post then this."
(hunterkirk)
"Religion is so easy to exploit by those who know exactly which sensitive spots should be pushed in order to make people act irrationally. Because dealing with the real root of the problem is too complicated. No, apparently even addressing it in a sincere way is too difficult."
(ddstory)
"The people are sheep. Whether the Republicans are shepherds is another matter."
(gillen)
"Rush kicks your asses enough as a private citizen."
(hunterkirk)
"A little obsessed with others who are a little obsessed with others being Jindal obsessed?"
(hunterkirk)
60
"Unsupported, unsupportable ravings of a madperson."
(babystrangeloop)
"Nonsense, when I rant I fume, swear, turn purple, and then fall on the floor and start chewing the carpet. I win."
(underlankers)
"In Delaware, the largest growth of population is Indian Americans, moving from India. You cannot go to a 7/11 or a Dunkin’ Donuts unless you have a slight Indian accent. I’m not joking."
(Joe Biden)
"I'm looking for donations/sponsors if anyone wants to fund the revolution. Any senior Walmart reps want to bring democracy to the free world?"
(allhatnocattle)
"Payback and revenge sounds to me too childish to be worth applying to such serious matters as the future 4 years of your country and all other countries around the world."
(ddstory)
"Japan doesn't need a military they have robots to protect them."
(lordtwinkie)
"Yes I was hoping to get some personal opinion from the OP. Then perhaps we could have a discussion. I usually don't click on links without commentary. It could be a porn site with viruses...ya know..."
(mahnmut)
"When you're in a fucking hole, the first thing to do is fucking quit digging."
(xforge)
"[Abstinence] is such a policy makes sense in a rustic setting such as a small town in Alaska"
(sophia_sadek)
"Yeah, it certainly worked out great for the Palins."
(vee_ecks)
"The only difference [between patriotism and nationalism] is who gets to win the contest and who gets to lose. The history of the world my sweet, is who gets eaten and who gets to eat."
(underlankers)
"Whether a prison is private or public has little to do with how corrupt and misguided much of our justice system is."
(ihatepeoplealot)
50
"Why do people listen to political pundits anyway? ... It's got something to do with the echo chamber and one's sweet feeling from having their own biases and delusions amplified."
(mahnmut)
"I have to suppose that there are people who are able to sleep well at night only after having owned someone's ass (or at least its sufficient that they think they've owned it)".
(abomvubuso)
"On occasion I find myself thinking that monarchy is much preferable to democracy. In monarchy, I'm the slave of one person. In democracy, I'm the slave of everyone."
(lucazzo)
"Penicillin is a sacred substance. Where would we be without it? Without pot, maybe a couple of dunkin donuts would go out of business."
(jellomarx)
"SO... Obama has spent 1 to 9 Trillion to buy the economy. Is it not fair to say that anything bad in the economy from this point on is his fault?"
(hunterkirk)
"Is every criticism against Obama going to contain the phrase "so much for change" in it for the next 4 years? Because it really got old 2 minutes after he took the office."
(madali)
"It will never get old no matter how much obama never provides change."
(jlc20thmaine)
"Every one of us is some kind of attention whore. Otherwise we would have stayed away from LJ."
(airiefairie)
"It had rocket ships! And - and - dinosaurs! And a whole army of friggin' daleks and cyclons! And then they all turned into transformers and fought to control the Earth! But then they got bored and went to the store to buy Pocky instead!"
(malasadas)
"Don't sweat it, dude. Barack is in power now, it will all be okay."
(mijopo)
"ZOMG technical violashun look wut I found!"
(njyoder)
40
"Then again trying to apply reason to religion is to look for roses in a fish market."
(kinvore)
"A major reason a very deep recession turned into the Great Depression was the fact that countries turned inward."
(Bill Lane, Caterpillar)
"Better yet maybe we can pay people to kill themselves.. we need to save the planet."
(hunterkirk)
"The last time Paris caught cold in a big way, the rest of Europe started sneezing."
(underlankers)
"The jews have much to learn from turkey. they need to treat the palestinians with the same love and compassion that the turks showered on the kurds, cypriots and armenians."
(debergerac)
"Iff their anny speling ers inn mai peece, pleez punt dem aut ta mee."
(sophia_sadek)
"Writing letters to Iran seems to be like a fashion these days. I should try it too."
(mahnmut)
"Only a neocon would dare to label bipartisanship "blame sharing."
(savagemind)
"For people who don't care, talk_politics."
(reflaxion)
"Do you think Pelosi needs viagra to get it up? I heard rumors that she's hung like a Clinton."
(verytwistedmind)
30
"Wait, are girls actually expecting their head-to-body ratio to be equivalent to an orange and a pretzel stick?"
(pantsu)
"OMG! They are contributing to Global Warming with that bonfire! They are going to cause the glaciers on Iceland to melt and raise sea levels!"
(lather2002)
"Where do I sign up to get a lot of money for not providing high quality goods or services?"
(reality_hammer)
"Become a farmer."
(xforge)
"I'd like to rent some of that person's genius for a few hours."
(savagemind)
"Live in Russia, instead of playing post-apocalyptic RPGs."
(malasadas)
"We are about to bomb EVERYONE, and this time YOU will take the blame!"
(reflaxion)
"[Africans] need a Promised Land. I say send them all to Alabama."
(mahnmut)
"How long do you suppose it will be before the 1st lady's hair dressers destroy Michelle Obama's hair?"
(evilgrins)
"Why does [Michelle Obama] repeatedly choose colors from the visible spectrum?"
(bord_du_rasoir)
"I'm not reading my friends page for the rest of the week."
(pantsu)
20
"Jeesh, I thought you guys had a sense of humor."
(kinvore)
"The U.S. citizenry has shown a dissatisfaction with eternal sunshine up the butt."
(weswilson)
"Screw the children, pour white phosphorus on them!"
(lordtwinkie)
"Retard."
(badlydrawnjeff)
"No, you are. Here's why."
(strbjun)
"This place looks a bit light on right wingers."
(hollie_is_right)
"I make up for it."
(justgoto)
"You know, Joe, it's not the size of the Bible. It's the motion of the devotion."
(Jon Stewart)
"The sooner we learn to make fun of ourselves, the better."
(mahnmut)
"Its always been strange to me that ppl bother to waste their time to denounce at length smth they claim they dont care about."
(abomvubuso)
"It's strange how some people always seem to confuse good arguments with yelling and being rude..."
(szeretni)
"And and and, um, sometimes you misunderestimated me..."
(G.W.Bush)
10
"I was reading it, and then my eyes fell out. So I had to stop."
(the_rukh)
"If you could guarantee that the people [in Palestine] would listen to my solution, then I'd give you one."
(gunslnger)
"It's time for congress to rejuvenate the sexual appetite of America."
(Larry Flynt)
"Kids do the darnedest things!"
(justgoto)
"Positions shift incoherantly depending on the User. Revenge is fife for long distant pwning."
(acesspadesdice)
"I expect this to be updated DAILY or I will throw a tantrum... daily."
(soliloquy76)
"Not-so-good ways to relieve stress: jumping off a building."
(abomvubuso)
"I wish that being an atheist didn't feel like a crime."
(savagemind)
"[Real spam] doesn't happen often in political communities. - Only when Russia attacks someone."
(airiefairie)
"The last word doesn't always win."
(grandhoser)
Daily quotes on talk_politics.
Daily quote:
"My theory is that your theory is not just as valid as my theory. If your theory involves my theory being valid..."
(enders_shadow)
"Americans like to have really big refrigerators and they like to put all kinds of stuff in there."
(majortom_thecat)
"Unless it's in the Deep South. In which case, those big refrigerators sit on the front porch waiting to be fixed one day."
(kardashev)
"Everyone knows that the 1970s didn't end until ABBA broke up."
(malasadas)
"I think you should be banned from being cloned. One of you is nine too many."
(vox_diabolica)
"The best part about conspiracies is that they're unnecessary since you can always trust people to do the dumbest fucking thing."
(mcpreacher)
"You'd be amazed how much clearer the world looks when looked at through the bottom of an empty bottle."
(htpcl)
"I am for any holiday that has as its symbols a fat man with magic reindeer and a mischievous baby that breaks into your house."
(sqiffy)
360
"Once something has been approved by the Government, It's no longer immoral."
[Rev T. Lovejoy]
"Don't worry. The lefties will start posting in this thread too once they wake up and recover from their drug-fueled sex orgies. It's hard to get out of bed after a night of Romanesque debauchery, you see."
(kardashev)
"If alien civilizations were looking for places to establish contact with intelligent species they'd take one look at our Congress and scratch this planet off the list."
(reality_hammer)
"I can't fathom why those who put healthcare for others at the top of their list of important things, moreso than anything else, aren't donating almost all of their disposable income to helping their fellow man. I figure it's just greed on their part."
(mrbogey)
"What's with all the sudden hate-on wrt realpolitik? Shit, I thought we were unabashed in our pride for such a strategem. Christ, we only killed how many thousands of Cambodians over it. I, for one, am proud of this crowning achievement."
(meus_ovatio)
"I like people who carry guns. Makes me feel safe. You know, in the event that I ever need a gun, I just have to take it from some wannabe chump who doesn't know the first thing about gun control."
(meus_ovatio)
"Your mistake is in assuming that there are actually people on the other side of the internet from your computer screen."
(malasadas)
"Arcasm? That sounds like some sort of electrically induced moment of pleasure."
(anfalicious)
"America probably isn't the best nation on Earth. But you're free to leave it to go live in the best nation on Earth. That counts for a lot."
(mrbogey)
"I think the state has an inalienable right to get in the kitchen and make me a sammich before I pimp slap it with mah sneaker."
(kardashev)
350
"If it bleeds, I can kill it."
(prader)
"[Self pwnage] doesn't matter if the pwnage depends on the community looking at it."
(panookah)
"Think about the children! Do you want them to eat crab? What if both their parents are shellfish-eaters? That potentially makes all their children shellfish-eaters too!"
(htpcl)
"Ayers = marxist -> Marxism -> Socialism -> Anti-Christianity -> Evolution -> Nazis -> Japanese -> Asians -> China -> Opium -> Afghanistan -> Osama. Ergo Ayers = Osama bin Laden."
(a_new_machine)
"If you make a desert, yes, that's peace, but it is the peace of the graveyard."
(underlankers)
"Optimists proclaim we live in the best possible world, pessimists fear they are correct."
(prader)
"OK let's keep shitting into our own pot while pretending that shit falls from the sky and not from our own ass - until the pot is full of shit and there's nothing left to eat."
(ddstory)
"Just tax the poppies. Instant solvency."
(a_new_machine)
"Fear is a factor which can make humans act surprisingly rational."
(underlankers)
"It's a shame that literacy tests were such a racist tool of oppression."
(drcruel)
340
"The best way to defeat [uninformed opinions] is to demonstrate in a consistent and sensible way how stupid and uninformed they are. Yelling at their author what a douchebag he is, usually earns you nothing - except the revelation in front of others that, perhaps, you're no different than the douchebag in question."
(abomvubuso)
"I contend we are both atheists, I just believe in one fewer god than you do. When you understand why you dismiss all the other possible gods, you will understand why I dismiss yours."
[Stephen F. Roberts]
"Rome was founded by a pair of unwanted bambinos: the Cain and Abel of Seven Hills."
(sophia_sadek)
"Feces in hand? Cry havoc! And let loose the poo of war!!!"
(the_rukh)
"I've always had a hard time trying to understand why people take pride in something they have nothing to do with."
(ddstory)
"Yes, the error is correct"
(htpcl)
"If only there was some way we could just take all that money the people who are disposed towards investment have, and give it to the people who are disposed towards making impulse purchases on credit, that would be great!"
(prader)
"Do you see being Asian, black,or homo-sexual as being the same?"
(geezer_also)
"Yes. They are essentially unchangeable qualities of people. Unless you are Michael Jackson."
(thies)
"I pledge vehemence to the flag of the United States of America, Incorporated, and to Republicans who I can't stand. One nation thinks it's God, unapproachable, with the best liberty and justice money can buy. Amen."
(ygrii_blop)
"That is the cutest, most huggable, lovable, story ever. Its like a lil' kitten, too cute to disprove."
(root_fu)
330
"Sorry, have to go. I'm going to meet a few oppressed Bulgarian women who I intend to force to consume considerable amounts of alcohol and salads, and later possibly dance with me in the disco."
(htpcl)
"An economist will know tomorrow why they were wrong today about a prediction they made yesterday."
(mahnmut)
"Two wrongs don't make a right, but three rights make a left."
(the_rukh)
"We're Americans. We can't possibly admit that other countries can be better than us at anything, because then it might turn out that the universe really doesn't revolve around us after all, and we don't have the Wellbutrin reserves to deal with that concept yet."
(reflaxion)
"Just load the jury pool with tea party activists and then remind them that President Obama wants a conviction in this case. It would have the added benefit of a number of them dropping dead from the stress of not knowing whether or not to fry the terrorists or give Obama the finger."
(malasadas)
"The length of a discussion is in a straight correlation to the stupidity of the OP, and in a reversed correlation to the length of said OP."
(abomvubuso)
"I've heard some tribes in Papua New-Guinea have a protocol of making their visitors crawl before their "emperor"."
(htpcl)
"Huh, I guess Biden did kind of mysteriously disappear, didn't he?"
(fleaplus)
"Yeah, he became vice-president."
(masterific)
"[The countdown display on the apocalypse cake] It's signaling we're one second away from a hippie-vegan meltdown? I see an upside."
(fizzyland)
"One would hope they would have contingency documents/positions/etc for just such an event where the Emperor (heh) could give a quick, broad answer and provide details later."
(reality_hammer)
320
"Children who have critical thinking skills are a total pain in the ass."
(schquee)
"Q. Is it just me? A. No, the cow that jumped over the moon was actually blue."
(geezer_also)
"I'm now confused about the extents to which the term 'troll' has stretched nowadays. I guess it's the new 'socialism' on the Nets."
(mahnmut)
"Things could be learned through failure, too. Preferably someone else's failure. Stupid people learn from their own mistakes. Smart people learn from others' mistakes."
(abomvubuso)
"I for one, embrace our degenerate Mandarin masters and their sweet, sweet Orange Chicken."
(fizzyland)
"I'm a multi-tasked weapon of mass alcohol depletion."
(htpcl)
"Teenagers haven't got fully developed minds yet and their skulls are still too soft to retain information. They just imprint from their surroundings until they reach maturity or, failing that, become Randians."
(vox_diabolica)
"For your next post, you should debone an entire duck."
(malasadas)
"Nothing comes free but the cheese in the mouse trap."
(htpcl)
"Intelligence sounds like a good quality too yet there is a joke about "military intelligence" being an oxymoron."
(kunaifusu)
310
"Italics have a known liberal bias."
(dwer)
"And bolds are self-sufficient fat conservatives. Everybody knows that."
(mahnmut)
"I assume you'd deny any effort by the government that would include increasing literacy for children. Its okay, we don't expect you to competently express your opinions."
(ironhawke)
"Republicans aren't as colorful as the Democrats when it comes to election-rigging, but there's a ruthless effectiveness in it that you can't help but respect."
(surferelf)
"You can't have honey without tar. It's not interesting."
(mahnmut)
"I give you the tar, i'll take the honey. Be entertained, leave to me the art of being bored but full."
(abomvubuso)
"Cynicism is healthy for the nerves. Let the idealists blabber their nonsense, then die young."
(mahnmut)
"Give me a Hanzo sword and I can reform the government over the course of two movies!"
(fizzyland)
"My point is so much more important than everyone else's that it must have its own post separate from the main thread on the topic, so that everyone can see how amazing and wonderful I am."
(reflaxion)
"I get all my news from political cartoons and billboards. My granny died after Nobama threatened her with a pig. Read my blog."
(mcpreacher)
"Some would argue that sex is not physical harm, but what do I know about sex..."
(mahnmut)
"It's all about who you know and who you blow."
(panookah)
"Let's not bring Chicago politics into the discussion."
(debergerac)
300
"Somehow you manage to take subjects on which you and I should agree and make me not want to agree with you. You have a gift."
(udoswald)
"You're asking me to read something from lewrockwell.com? I think I'd rather remove my own pancreas with a rusty grapefruit spoon."
(malasadas)
"The fist bump originated as a Masonic secret handshake."
(sophia_sadek)
"Stop whining Russky, we've got our own problems-and while you're here, could you spare a few barrels of oil?"
(acesspadesdice)
"Sadly a 3 minute segment on utter nonsense is not unique to fox news."
(sqiffy)
"Sadly Fox isn't limited to 3 minutes of utter nonsense."
(kinvore)
"The world would be better off if we all got our political views from singing puppets."
(mighty_carrot)
"It's ok for black students to be racist, because they aren't white."
(cgallivan)
"You keep on keeping on. Someday you'll learn, or expire. Even odds on which is first."
(dwer)
"I want to know how you do a reenactment of the Cold War."
(devil_ad_vocate)
"You glare at each other a lot, occasionally punch a bystander, and then go home."
(reflaxion)
"At some point you go from clever advertising to the equivalent of a three year old yelling loudly at the mall."
(sqiffy)
290
"Now imagine that 70 years later a bunch of questionably qualified people on the internet debate the imaginary outcomes furiously, eventually relying on stock, sound bite replies provided by long forgotten professors or anonymous bloggers."
(malasadas)
"When Germany drives alone, it drives with Hitler!"
(mcpreacher)
"The military is only a projection of policy, and policy is driven by economic interests."
(htpcl)
"It's Canadian Thanksgiving and Columbus Day, far fewer North Americans are fucking around on the internet."
(mijopo)
"We friggin Africons and them bloody Eurotards do compensate for it to some extent."
(mahnmut)
"7 comments to a comment commenting on the number of comments to a mod post, the fuck?"
(the_rukh)
"Political satire became obsolete when Henry Kissinger was awarded the Nobel Prize."
[Tom Lehrer]
"I advise all good libs to become breatherians. It's the socially reponsible thing to do."
(debergerac)
"Sending an egg there is like sending a Democrat to backwoods West Virginia: nobody knows what's going on, but the locals are smiling in a distinctly unpleasant way."
(a_new_machine)
"Money gets you through the times of no freedom better than freedom gets you through the times of no money."
(abomvubuso)
"I thought this was talk_politics, not real_solutions_for_real_problems."
(prader)
280
"True knowledge is gained by honest intellectual reflection. Not by trying to stockpile talking points."
(panookah)
"I think creationists are all the proof we need that evolution just ain't happening."
(op_tech_glitch)
"I don't think there is a way to "win" in Afghanistan. I'm not even sure what winning means for us or them."
(rhomea)
"I just can't understand why people in your country are so freaked out. I really can't. This is like some kind of animation movie where everyone's screaming and jumping around like nuts. It's extremely funny and creepy at the same time."
(htpcl)
"If we killed every poll about killing, then we're just hypocrites for killing those who say they'd kill, even though no killing has yet been done by the killer we're killing!"
(abomvubuso)
"Let's face it, okay? The U.S.A. is like a candy bar. It's full of nuts."
(ygrii_blop)
"The Jews already own the world. Why would they want to nuke it?"
(debergerac)
"We are launching a thriving glassworks industry and that's a very quick way to avoid paying skilled artisans."
(malasadas)
"[Kretek] is clearly a first amendment issue. how else will smokers of cloves be able to express their complete and utter snobbish lameness?"
(socialdarwinism)
"Maybe some president should pass a big spending bill that includes lots of construction project money that the republicans froth at the mouth about socialism over."
(the_rukh)
"Frankly I think you all are nuts, but that's very possibly due to my age, conservatism, and legalism.....so carry on."
(geezer_also)
270
"Your wild flailing at putting together wild theories would help us right now, our air conditioning is out right now, as we could use the breeze generated by you."
(404)
"I am joe biden irlbiden IRL. ... There's not much for me to do so I just sit in the senate hoping nobody realizes I don't wear pants while I blackberry."
(mcpreacher)
"[You] would have most likely been shot and the body would have been hidden. At least that's what I was told would happen to me if I got too close to anybody's marijuana patch in northern CA."
(majortom_thecat)
"Flaming gay thugs heat up the atmosphere!"
(thies)
"One man's bullshit is another man's fertilizer."
(reality_hammer)
"If you could prove the existence of God with science, what you would prove is that he is not God."
(policraticus)
"We're a superstitious lot. Which is why Young Earth Creationism, moon landing deniers, 9/11 Truthers and Birthers all get such traction in this country."
(fizzyland)
"I'm convinced [Kanye] is an alien. Check out the crop circles on his head."
(soliloquy76)
"I hear the tinkling of broken glass. It's someone's lol-o-meter."
(ddstory)
"Attack the source. The easiest way to make an issue disappear. "You lie!" Poof. Problem solved."
(ddstory)
"What do young atheists care about?"
(horsdumonde)
"The same things as theists, minus one."
(mahnmut)
260
"[9/11] was a shocking event that will forever change American political discourse, those directly affected, and the countless bumpers of moron's automobiles."
(kko)
"I thought about sending the GWB Library a packet of geranium seeds. They would look nice planted in a painted tire out on the front lawn."
(devil_ad_vocate)
"Dear People of Zimbabwe, I'm right in between cleaning out my belly button and taking a long nap, but please feel free to wake me up when you strike oil. Sincerely, Uncle Sam."
(jblaque)
"White people do poison colored communities."
(socialdarwinism)
"Correction...rich people poison poor communities."
(l555l)
"Sometimes I get into these weird moods where I think people are actually interested in figuring out what is true rather than just scoring points according to their own, strange, rating systems."
(ed_rex)
"Actually [Obama] was too busy eating kittens and left the speechwriting to the last moment."
(the_rukh)
"I don't want barack obama ordering MY CHILD to make him a macaroni birth certificate so he can continue hoodwinking AMERICA! no sirree bob!"
(mcpreacher)
"Talking of health care is what makes me dizzy. P'haps i should go see a doc."
(abomvubuso)
"So are you saying it wasn't ok then and and isn't now, or that it was ok then since it is now, or are you being hypocritical?"
(the_rukh)
"If I'd president I'd just declare everyone must think happy thoughts. Then disband the military since we'll be at peace. And we can grow food. And since food is free it's good that we can pay the farmers... and stuff."
(mrbogey)
250
"I have a whole finger I'd be glad to give to Mr. Rice."
(op_tech_glitch)
"Is it because you Liberals go around harvesting them from Conservatives (via your teeth)?? "
(consortofvenus)
"We get em from taxes."
(mcpreacher)
"Do not deprive [US people] of [the] opportunity to hate and fear whatever country they've made the irrational choice to hate and fear."
(mahnmut)
"If everyone would agree that college football, viewed in HD on a large screen TV is a right, not a privilege then I'd be happy."
(reality_hammer)
"I despise moneyed interests using their cash and their power to do whatever they want and who fucking cares what happens to people."
(xforge)
"You do realize this describes politics, right?"
(brucenstein)
"Obama's poll numbers are excellent. Its the people taking the polls who suck."
(root_fu)
"Apparently the Japanese communist party has been gaining members at 1000+ a month for quite some time now, so it's only a matter of time. I hope it works out well for them and I believe it will."
(kko)
"Global warming should be taken completely out of the realm of politics...and turned over to religion."
(devil_ad_vocate)
"You'll have to pry my thumbscrews and testicle crushers from my cold dead fingers!"
(devil_ad_vocate)
"Any good manager (which is effectively what politicians are) knows that they are only as good as the people who work for them."
(mrsilence)
"Permanent friendship doesn't exist. Just temporary benefits and fragile networks of interests. A common principle of big-scale geopolitics."
(htpcl)
240
"If Beck could organize his thoughts into some coherent form - preferably with an ability to spell - and reach a conclusion beyond: "We're going to transform into something!", I might believe he is a rational human. Until then, it's: Argle, argle, bipitty boo, sumpin jumped out of my butt, and itz gonna scare you!"
(devil_ad_vocate)
"Look now, you got me so confused I tried to put my shoe on my head and my hat on my ass."
(htpcl)
"[79% is] considered a very low percentage in the Fox parallel universe. One could easily call it a minority, even."
(mahnmut)
"Those who pervert the past by applying the arbitrary details of them to each political point they either oppose or support are pieces of shit."
(new_wave_witch)
"Thanks for further illustrating that you're a loose rush of watery shit."
(ygrii_blop)
"A lot of conservatives who are actually able to use their brain must be feeling pretty embarrassed these days."
(ddstory)
"If I chant "It's just a not-so-elaborate troll" and click my heels three times, will it go away?"
(speciesofspaces)
"Will you all please stop talking about healthcare and post something on a topic I actually know something about so that I can make an intelligent comment?"
(pmax3)
"Democracy [is] a great concept for a people-driven system, frequently ruined by the fact that most people are complete idiots."
(reflaxion)
"Looks like screaming gibberish like a retard is after all the best way to do politics."
(thies)
230
"I think the 'mental retardation' part could be problematic for anyone with real responsibility, ie, not just a mouthpiece."
(squidb0i)
"First of kudos to the President for using the word pittance! That's like using whilst. You just don't get to do that every day!"
(verytwistedmind)
"If you use enough bold words, exclamation posts, and race cards in your posts, does it really invalidate the concept of doctors advocating unnecessary procedures in order to make a larger profit? And can I apply this technique to other arguments, too?"
(reflaxion)
"If socialism is the new 'N' word I think Microsoft Word (and all Microsoft 2007 programs) should be considered some racial pejorative."
(verytwistedmind)
"Politics is greed disguised as morality."
(allhatnocattle)
"Four years is a long time to gut the economy."
(reality_hammer)
Wouldn't gut it any more than our defense budget, mein herr."
(mcpreacher)
"I see no reason for the administration to fret about pleasing people who are insane."
(devil_ad_vocate)
"Chances are, purely statistically, that you'd end up on the side of the colonized rather than the colonizator. Well, at this point you apparently are not (not that you'd have internet access to complain about it on online forums, if you were)."
(mahnmut)
"The true measure of tyranny is to be a tyrant that does nothing tyrannical."
(underlankers)
"I've got my heart set on being a member of one of B. Hussein O.'s Death Panel. I hear it'll include a 401k match. Ads out soon!"
(speciesofspaces)
220
"I got accused of being a racist because I voted for McCain, so saying "look at the pot calling the kettle black".... Just seems like it might be crossing a line or hurting a feeling."
(__birdie__)
"Guys, i strongly recommend you take a deep breath, perhaps drink a glass of cold water (or two glasses), or lemon juice if you prefer; then go out and have some fresh air; meet some friends, have a beer; then maybe you'd return to this conversation if you like. You'd be amazed by the effect of the above-mentioned activities."
(abomvubuso)
"C'mon people, if freakin' Tumnas can shoot a bullet out of mid-air on the fly in "Wanted," I don't see how we can't just lob missiles randomly and expect them to stop hundreds of carefully-aimed, computer-guided warheads."
(a_new_machine)
"In fact that's got to be the most unintentionally funny things I've ever read, and I've read Twilight."
(kinvore)
"Everyone's free to spout whatever ridiculous bullshit they care to."
(squidb0i)
"But they can't stop you from crossing your arms as hard as you can."
(kadeshaderow)
"Jesus Christ, guys, chill out, [Obama] won't give anybody healthcare, you can still safely assume poor people will die for no reason. life goes on."
(mcpreacher)
"I'm afraid you've just outed yourself as a resident of the fake America. In real America, Palinite is a widely understood dialect."
(theminaoflife)
"People should stop thinking they're so goddamn clever for being able to yell 'godwin' whenever they see the word 'nazi' or 'hitler' on the fucking internet."
(mijopo)
"Maybe the Left's Karl Rove, from his base underneath the low carbon emission volcano, has managed this one."
(l555l)
"Bill O is a talk show host, not a politician, any one who takes his word as gospel is as stupid as those who believe the middle class will not be taxed."
(__birdie__)
210
"Both Stewart and Colbert should make an altar to the likes of Beck and sacrifice fruit to them every day in gratitude for being provided ample material to do their shows on a daily basis. It is a win-win scheme for all of them."
(airiefairie)
"You are fat irl and your whiteness makes it not as charming."
(mcpreacher)
"How did this country go insane?"
(ygrii_blop)
"A black guy lives in a white building."
(mylaptopisevil)
"My philosophy is that even one who still claims the Earth is flat does not deserve having insults hurled at them, but I have recognised long ago that I am a minority in thinking so."
(airiefairie)
"A well thought out post with a passionately argued point illustrated in great detail? There is no way anyone is going to pay attention to this."
(panookah)
"Can I blame Marilyn Manson for negatively influencing the Israeli's? How about Grand Theft Auto West Bank?"
(root_fu)
"The economy is not as important as a black man being arrested and released."
(the_rukh)
"Democrat Death Squads are being dispatched to your location, please remain where you are and prepare to be liquidated for the greater good."
(fizzyland)
"When Obama finally caves to pressure from birthers in the name of bipartisanship and unveils his birth certificate, it better be notarized by Jesus himself or there will be blood."
(squidb0i)
"Yes pie > politics, I think everyone can agree with that. Except for those who like cake, but we have the moral high ground because Hitler liked cake, too."
(kinvore)
200
"I have no reason to believe you aren't sure of your opinion, but ultimately it's not very useful."
(the_rukh)
"As Mark Twain said, the truth is stranger than fiction, but it because fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities. Truth isn't."
(the_rukh)
"Today we commemorate the death of the coverage-of-the-death of Michael Jackson."
[Stephen Colbert]
"Wikipedia is 110% accurate. It's so accurate that if it's ever "wrong" then it's easily provable that it's actually reality that's wrong"
(smokngoat)
"I know I'm not surrounded by idiots. Idiots are just the loudest and most obnoxious members of society."
(panookah)
"If you people on the left would stop watching and/or listening to the "Right wing fanatics" their ratings would go down and they would soon be off the air."
(geezer_also)
"Please keep the Communism meme up. Each misuse of the word dilutes its meaning until it becomes meaningless."
(soliloquy76)
"You mean like the non-started communist dictatorship that Obama is about to non-start?"
(ddstory)
"Nope that one is already in process."
(hunterkirk)
"Rights are a stupid human construct. The only rights you ever have are the ones you can defend."
(flagg2ptoh)
"Are you the type of person that takes medicine for a headache then gets pissed off your headache didn't go away an hour before you took the medicine?"
(the_rukh)
190
"Europe would not have disintegrated had Moscow been nuked. But we would have."
(robert_johnson)
"Fascism is paramilitary nation-statism."
(underlankers)
"There is no good or evil. Only actions we paint as having those motivations. And Hitler."
(l555l)
"Religion is not necessary for us to exist but that says very little about how valuable it can be."
(pantsu)
"Watching the left unleash all of its hysterical, hate-filled wrath at Governor Palin is all people need to witness to understand how regimes like Nazi Germany came to be."
(reality_hammer)
"I wish [Palin] would present her birth certificate so we could settle this business about her being born in Kenya."
(allhatnocattle)
"All that Europeans are allowed to talk about is soccer, fashion, food and sex (like anyone in America cares about these)."
(airiefairie)
"Hur hur teh librul mediaz heart Oblahma an he shud be sendin gunz 2 Iran."
(squidb0i)
"Dramatic exchanges of stupidity sound as if they can be (albeit barely) legitimized by sheer entertainment value"
(lady_eclectic)
"At the rate Obama's going, [Palin] will quite possibly win."
(badlydrawnjeff)
180
"God forbid the pre-election polls ever correctly predict who is going to win an election!"
(ddstory)
"I am as horrified at the notion of civil authorities forcing women NOT to wear burqas as I am at the notion of religious authorties forcing women TO wear burqas."
(dartmouth05)
"Where is the sword in your life? What do you seek to accomplish with the crude instrument of Caesar?"
(sophia_sadek)
"Argentine girls: they'll fuck you up."
(prog_expat)
"The British are like the rest of the Europeans? Who knew."
(mahnmut)
"Recently I experienced how banks are exploding this in not honest way and driving people in financial whole."
(r_frigg)
"I am clearly the most intersting thing that has happened in this community ever"
(acesspadesdice)
"Schools should be free to teach reality and not be held hostage to whatever silly fairy tales you have invented."
(sqiffy)
"I am amazed at how people are trying to judge every country by their own standards of democracy."
(southwest)
"Trade in your trinity today and you get all five pillars for the price of one god! Guaranteed zombie free! Its a deal that will blow you away!"
(sqiffy)
170
"Do not hurry to judge a nation you don't know the whole story about."
(mahnmut)
"You didn't just backpedal, you moonwalked!"
(squidb0i)
"There are idiots everywhere, you cant deal with them by becoming like them, cos by that standard, you're the next target."
(abomvubuso)
"Why would an oligarchy be a bad thing? I believe in a ruling class as long as I am part of it."
(verytwistedmind)
"Ideological alignment trumps the desire for quality.
(Ultimus Mahnmutus)"
(mahnmut)
"Forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those that trespass against us."
(allhatnocattle)
"I believe after Vietnam no one really had the stomach to do anything about SE Asia"
(lordtwinkie)
"You can't "damage" something that has a primary attribute of "change"."
(gunslnger)
"Using people as a means to achieve an ends is never an appropriate action."
(pantsu)
"Naw I am just the kind of person who questions assumptions of others and goes against conventional wisdom.... I call it thinking outside the box."
(hunterkirk)
160
"I've come to question the existence of the planet Venus altogether. Wasn't it invented by the Pagans in the first place? What do those fools know. After all, they didn't worship Jesus."
(sophia_sadek)
"What if his karma ran over his dogma?"
(underlankers)
"Can you think of anyone who has done more to promote the cause of al Qaeda than the Bushites?"
(sophia_sadek)
"Yes, Al Qaeda."
(thies)
"Those crazy Eskimos....must be global warming warming up their blood up there."
(underlankers)
"[The reptiloids] want to enslave us because they need to exploit our resources (read: huge quantities of poo, and who produces the most of it? guessed right - those who are scared shitless!)"
(mahnmut)
"I, like most people, am not well-versed in all the tenets of libertarianism."
(valknott)
"I can sum it up for you: Free will. Non-aggression. Bestiality."
(soliloquy76)
"Our political philosophies are not aligned."
(bebopmonkey)
"Obama's multi-sexual. Everyone wants him."
(szeretni)
"Whats the cube root of Jesus expressed in the form of interpretive dance? I dont think science can get that one."
(mahnmut)
"What the Hell is a Latina woman?"
(underlankers)
"According to the supreme court it is someone of the female gender who votes for Democrats and has a Hispanic surname."
(reality_hammer)
150
"I've come to fucking despise contemporary political discourse and have chosen to withdraw from it to maintain my sanity."
(bord_du_rasoir)
"ALL-LOL or ALL-AH? Methinks you're a terrist..."
(ghoststrider)
"Praise LoLah! May many lols be upon him."
(cgallivan)
"No one really likes to take an honest look at demographics. It reveals so many unpleasant realities."
(reality_hammer)
"I think the Russians and Israels have pretty much debunked the "girls can't fight" myth."
(reality_hammer)
"Sulu demands explanation for this gawdamn bullshit!"
(op_tech_glitch)
"There has to be something to keep the rest of us interested in between the Democrat/Republican retardation that goes on."
(panookah)
"Your historic references are as relevant as a corset on the 2009 Academy Awards ball, or the duel code in a 21st century California high school."
(mahnmut)
"Incarceration is a torture too, I invite anyone who thinks it is not to stay in prison."
(kunaifusu)
"I first assume that everyone lies out of the side of their mouth, then I look for some evidence that they're NOT lying."
(valknott)
"A Mormon shall be President of the United States when a Jew will lead the American Nazi Party."
(underlankers)
140
"The biological purpose of sex is still procreation no matter what secondary purposes it may be utilised as."
(pantsu)
"Self-delusion is not a prerogative of the religious only. But they often come hand in hand."
(abomvubuso)
"If centrism were the answer, McCain would have been perfect."
(justgoto)
"I sense that if you scratch a libertarian you'll find an anarchist."
(policraticus)
"When the realities of the world come crashing down on puny man's politics it soon ceases to be about right and wrong. All that remains afterwords is necessary and unnecessary."
(panookah)
"I should probably warn you that President Obama is currently preparing to send a gang of imbeciles to break in to YOUR psychiatrist's office, and search for personal psychiatric records which can be used to discredit you. The methodology has improved since President Nixon's day."
(henry_kissinger)
"I imagine the vehicle of the future being powered by electricity, produced from nuclear fusion, and stored in highly efficient batteries."
(airiefairie)
"It's only ironic if you buy into the man-made climate change hypothesis."
(reality_hammer)
"Or if you buy into those other pesky scientific facts like gravity, evolution and genetics."
(telemann)
"What is the violent crime rate of returning solders compared to that of any Democrat control city? Bet you your next years income it is far lower."
(hunterkirk)
"I like lobsters. Do the gay lobsters taste differently from the straight lobsters?"
(airiefairie)
"There's a bit more crunch due to the glitter."
(evil_admiral)
130
"Don't make me come over there and Godwin you."
(reality_hammer)
"I rooned your servay."
(soliloquy76)
"Of COURSE Obama's a liar. He's the President of the United States."
(gillen)
"Can you imagine what would happen to a herd of gazelle if they all slowed down to help the lame ones? The lions would eat better that's for damn sure."
(flagg2ptoh)
"Obama's Right-wing by any standard except the American standard."
(underlankers)
"If people worked instead of sitting around in cafes then maybe something would improve around here."
(panookah)
"Bonus irony points for saying this whilst sitting around in a cafe talking about politics."
(tcpip)
"China has a significant naval force and it is getting larger every year."
(reality_hammer)
"Good for them. We wish them good luck with invading the world."
(mahnmut)
"How do you LOL a horse-donkey hybrid off? Don't tell me, I don't want to know..."
(underlankers)
"So...what precisely did the Democrats do [in 100 days]?"
(underlankers)
"Same thing they try to do every day, Pinky: try to take over the world."
(soliloquy76)
"I think the most attractive thing in a person is partisan gloating and an undeserved sense of accomplishment. Especially when people seem to think that they have won something along the lines of the super bowl when their party of choice wins a majority, and or some election somewhere."
(panookah)
120
"See, there's another reason [Specter] doesn't belong in the Republican party: he has a sense of humor."
(soliloquy76)
"And he's attracted to women. So he's always been a Democrat at heart."
(allhatnocattle)
"Inside every Latvian is a Russian yearning to be free."
(debergerac)
"Environmentalists have been complaining about human over population."
(hunterkirk)
"Just give me control of all US money and you won't have to worry about it anymore."
(mahnmut)
"What can an Indian do on a post? Dancing and stripping."
(airiefairie)
"But hey, its politics. It brings out the worst in people."
(strbjun)
"A Middle Eastern country is our ally during the time between when we give them weapons, and when they start using them."
(Stephen Colbert)
"One of the parties in our two party system is bad? Now that I can get behind. I would hate to have to sit down and analyze things with the realization that both parties have their merits and flaws. Thank god for democracy."
(panookah)
"Whatever happened to true federalism? When did we as Americans start thinking so little of the sovereignty of the states? Maybe some poeple just live in shitty ones or something."
(panookah)
"Don't have to be a super power to perform leadership."
(the_rukh)
110
"If revealing the actions of the Bush administration makes the Bush administration look bad, then it's really the Bush administration that makes the Bush administration look bad."
(bertro)
"[Sarkozy] is French. I'm already disgusted with him."
(ghoststrider)
"People tend to get hysterical and irrational at times of difficulty, but on the other hand, their true nature is revealed in its full."
(mahnmut)
"You might be surprised but piracy has been known long before the Disney ride and its namesake films."
(kunaifusu)
"It's a sad day for America when Fidel Castro is more willing to work with the President of the United States than any member of the Republican leadership."
(rumorsofwar)
"When I grow up I wanna be you, only still looking like me. You get the point."
(verytwistedmind)
"This entry alone is seriously making me wonder why I even try participating in civil discussion here."
(pantsu)
"Because you cant resist the temptation?"
(abomvubuso)
"If the South can't handle driving with two inches of snow on the ground I doubt they've got the Civil War 2.0 in them."
(dv8nation)
"People should be allowed to hunt [Liberals] down freely and make necklaces out of their eyes."
(mahnmut)
"Eastern European LJ-ers use LJ for other things than talking nonsense and having silly little quarrels like most of us do."
(airiefairie)
"I think they just take their nonsense and silly little quarrels a lot more seriously."
(gunslnger)
100
"Mexico should provide financial aid and military training to the United States to help combat our gang problems."
(the_rukh)
"Your posts always make me feel like I'm in the Twilight Zone."
(pantsu)
"Don't touch that dial!"
(sophia_sadek)
"Fear makes people do stupid things. Like signing bail out bills before they are actually read."
(verytwistedmind )
"You must realize that this thread will be used extensively in future flame wars to throw people's words back at them - screenshots are probably being made after every comment."
(vacant_thomas)
"Reading, you're doing it wrong."
(kinvore)
"I'm not trying to read it properly. I'm trying to troll."
(panookah)
"As goes California so goes the nation. Unfortunately in this one instance direct democracy failed to do the right thing."
(panookah)
"Obama cured the great depression. Biden was there, he knows."
(debergerac)
"Who's concerned about the poor? I'm concerned about health care! The poor are helping pay for it. About time! Don't forget the added benefit of them dying sooner and not being a drain on the treasury after they retire."
(verytwistedmind)
"Contemporary figures of speech seems like a pretty feeble thing to worry about, IMO."
(new_wave_witch)
"Too many people want vengeance instead of justice."
(dwer)
90
"I sense a disturbance in the Force. There's been a resurgence of hit-n-run posts on TP."
(abomvubuso)
"Statistically speaking, the world's got to end sometime, and when it does, thousands of paranoid survivalists will emerge from their holes, triumphantly pumping their knock-off AK-47s in the air, screaming "I told you so!" just before the blast-wave hits and wipes out them, us, and all of their useless stockpiled ammunition out of existence."
(rumorsofwar)
"Are Democrat Failures on the Economy Emboldening the Terrorists? You decide!"
(rumorsofwar)
"But only crazy libertarians want to legalize pot...."
(gunslnger)
"Which is more important the USA or the Constitution?"
(hunterkirk)
"That's like asking "what's more important, my TV or the user manual?""
(mijopo)
"What changes would the US need to make in order to meet the requirements for membership, so that the EU could accept the US?"
(ddstory)
"Adopt UK spelling."
(abomvubuso)
"The invisible hand of the market fixed it with lollipops and moon dust. Of course you don't know, its invisible and responsible for anything good that happens to our economy."
(the_rukh)
"[In prostitution] There's plenty of exploitation to go around. It's basically a bunch of guys paying pretty girls to pretend to like them."
(kinvore)
"First they brought us lower gas prices now they are turning more women into strippers and hopefully adult ‘actresses’. I am seriously considering changing parties."
(verytwistedmind)
"Too often people use religion as an excuse for problems that are deeper than that."
(nairiporter)
80
"You often forget about the politics and make the argument more about the character of the person you are arguing with."
(pantsu)
"Its a slippery and easy road which many people tend to take when confronted with an opposing, and equally firm position. Its like two particles smashing against each other at the speed of light - you get all various kinda crazy stuff out of it."
(abomvubuso)
"I am reasonably certain that the world has a nearly unlimited capacity to not care what happens to Africans."
(malasadas)
"Stop trying to take away my God given right to label people based on their relation to my own narrow political positions. Dick."
(awful_jackass)
"Never underestimate the degree to which the modern American principal is a giant quivering nutsack in perpetual fear of being sued."
(malasadas)
"Anyone have a copy of the definition of war handy?"
(l555l)
"War is whatever you can get away with."
(babystrangeloop)
"Unicorns were eating Captain Crunch in my frontyard with James T. Kirk. - Prove it. - Guilty until proven innocent?"
(bord_du_rasoir)
"The idea of a Discworld populated by level-headed and colourite people appeals to me much more than a Roundworld full [of] dull round-headed deluded people who believe that they are great thinkers, which status gives them the authority to preach to others whatever nonsenses they deem appropriate (for themselves)."
(airiefairie)
"[Obama & Gordon Brown] should do wife swapping."
(verytwistedmind)
"Have you seen Sarah Brown? *shudders*"
(prog_expat)
"Pressing [search keyword: Obama]. Results: N/A. Pressing [search keyword: Limbaugh]. Results: N/A. Running away, crying."
(ddstory)
"Behind Chuck Norris' beard is a third fist."
(reality_hammer)
"His cock's on his chin? LL Cool Chuck!"
(vee_ecks)
70
"How do I hide part of my entry behind a link? What is an lj-cut?"
(ddstory)
"Can Canada have Maine? It'd cut down my driving time between Toronto and Fredericton significantly."
(tridus)
"Russians don't drink wine. They drink vodka. Like water. Literally it comes out of their taps. Well the ones that can afford indoor plumbing. Some hafta pump the vodka out of a well in the yard."
(lordtwinkie)
"But those failed economics are failed! Clearly the failed policies of the failed administration of the failure Ronald Reagan fail to stimulate!"
(reality_hammer)
"What do you think is a just way to process those who confess to murderous thoughts?"
(sophia_sadek)
"Treat em with kindness, compassion and let them join the Democratic party."
(debergerac)
"You can make a far better post then this."
(hunterkirk)
"Religion is so easy to exploit by those who know exactly which sensitive spots should be pushed in order to make people act irrationally. Because dealing with the real root of the problem is too complicated. No, apparently even addressing it in a sincere way is too difficult."
(ddstory)
"The people are sheep. Whether the Republicans are shepherds is another matter."
(gillen)
"Rush kicks your asses enough as a private citizen."
(hunterkirk)
"A little obsessed with others who are a little obsessed with others being Jindal obsessed?"
(hunterkirk)
60
"Unsupported, unsupportable ravings of a madperson."
(babystrangeloop)
"Nonsense, when I rant I fume, swear, turn purple, and then fall on the floor and start chewing the carpet. I win."
(underlankers)
"In Delaware, the largest growth of population is Indian Americans, moving from India. You cannot go to a 7/11 or a Dunkin’ Donuts unless you have a slight Indian accent. I’m not joking."
(Joe Biden)
"I'm looking for donations/sponsors if anyone wants to fund the revolution. Any senior Walmart reps want to bring democracy to the free world?"
(allhatnocattle)
"Payback and revenge sounds to me too childish to be worth applying to such serious matters as the future 4 years of your country and all other countries around the world."
(ddstory)
"Japan doesn't need a military they have robots to protect them."
(lordtwinkie)
"Yes I was hoping to get some personal opinion from the OP. Then perhaps we could have a discussion. I usually don't click on links without commentary. It could be a porn site with viruses...ya know..."
(mahnmut)
"When you're in a fucking hole, the first thing to do is fucking quit digging."
(xforge)
"[Abstinence] is such a policy makes sense in a rustic setting such as a small town in Alaska"
(sophia_sadek)
"Yeah, it certainly worked out great for the Palins."
(vee_ecks)
"The only difference [between patriotism and nationalism] is who gets to win the contest and who gets to lose. The history of the world my sweet, is who gets eaten and who gets to eat."
(underlankers)
"Whether a prison is private or public has little to do with how corrupt and misguided much of our justice system is."
(ihatepeoplealot)
50
"Why do people listen to political pundits anyway? ... It's got something to do with the echo chamber and one's sweet feeling from having their own biases and delusions amplified."
(mahnmut)
"I have to suppose that there are people who are able to sleep well at night only after having owned someone's ass (or at least its sufficient that they think they've owned it)".
(abomvubuso)
"On occasion I find myself thinking that monarchy is much preferable to democracy. In monarchy, I'm the slave of one person. In democracy, I'm the slave of everyone."
(lucazzo)
"Penicillin is a sacred substance. Where would we be without it? Without pot, maybe a couple of dunkin donuts would go out of business."
(jellomarx)
"SO... Obama has spent 1 to 9 Trillion to buy the economy. Is it not fair to say that anything bad in the economy from this point on is his fault?"
(hunterkirk)
"Is every criticism against Obama going to contain the phrase "so much for change" in it for the next 4 years? Because it really got old 2 minutes after he took the office."
(madali)
"It will never get old no matter how much obama never provides change."
(jlc20thmaine)
"Every one of us is some kind of attention whore. Otherwise we would have stayed away from LJ."
(airiefairie)
"It had rocket ships! And - and - dinosaurs! And a whole army of friggin' daleks and cyclons! And then they all turned into transformers and fought to control the Earth! But then they got bored and went to the store to buy Pocky instead!"
(malasadas)
"Don't sweat it, dude. Barack is in power now, it will all be okay."
(mijopo)
"ZOMG technical violashun look wut I found!"
(njyoder)
40
"Then again trying to apply reason to religion is to look for roses in a fish market."
(kinvore)
"A major reason a very deep recession turned into the Great Depression was the fact that countries turned inward."
(Bill Lane, Caterpillar)
"Better yet maybe we can pay people to kill themselves.. we need to save the planet."
(hunterkirk)
"The last time Paris caught cold in a big way, the rest of Europe started sneezing."
(underlankers)
"The jews have much to learn from turkey. they need to treat the palestinians with the same love and compassion that the turks showered on the kurds, cypriots and armenians."
(debergerac)
"Iff their anny speling ers inn mai peece, pleez punt dem aut ta mee."
(sophia_sadek)
"Writing letters to Iran seems to be like a fashion these days. I should try it too."
(mahnmut)
"Only a neocon would dare to label bipartisanship "blame sharing."
(savagemind)
"For people who don't care, talk_politics."
(reflaxion)
"Do you think Pelosi needs viagra to get it up? I heard rumors that she's hung like a Clinton."
(verytwistedmind)
30
"Wait, are girls actually expecting their head-to-body ratio to be equivalent to an orange and a pretzel stick?"
(pantsu)
"OMG! They are contributing to Global Warming with that bonfire! They are going to cause the glaciers on Iceland to melt and raise sea levels!"
(lather2002)
"Where do I sign up to get a lot of money for not providing high quality goods or services?"
(reality_hammer)
"Become a farmer."
(xforge)
"I'd like to rent some of that person's genius for a few hours."
(savagemind)
"Live in Russia, instead of playing post-apocalyptic RPGs."
(malasadas)
"We are about to bomb EVERYONE, and this time YOU will take the blame!"
(reflaxion)
"[Africans] need a Promised Land. I say send them all to Alabama."
(mahnmut)
"How long do you suppose it will be before the 1st lady's hair dressers destroy Michelle Obama's hair?"
(evilgrins)
"Why does [Michelle Obama] repeatedly choose colors from the visible spectrum?"
(bord_du_rasoir)
"I'm not reading my friends page for the rest of the week."
(pantsu)
20
"Jeesh, I thought you guys had a sense of humor."
(kinvore)
"The U.S. citizenry has shown a dissatisfaction with eternal sunshine up the butt."
(weswilson)
"Screw the children, pour white phosphorus on them!"
(lordtwinkie)
"Retard."
(badlydrawnjeff)
"No, you are. Here's why."
(strbjun)
"This place looks a bit light on right wingers."
(hollie_is_right)
"I make up for it."
(justgoto)
"You know, Joe, it's not the size of the Bible. It's the motion of the devotion."
(Jon Stewart)
"The sooner we learn to make fun of ourselves, the better."
(mahnmut)
"Its always been strange to me that ppl bother to waste their time to denounce at length smth they claim they dont care about."
(abomvubuso)
"It's strange how some people always seem to confuse good arguments with yelling and being rude..."
(szeretni)
"And and and, um, sometimes you misunderestimated me..."
(G.W.Bush)
10
"I was reading it, and then my eyes fell out. So I had to stop."
(the_rukh)
"If you could guarantee that the people [in Palestine] would listen to my solution, then I'd give you one."
(gunslnger)
"It's time for congress to rejuvenate the sexual appetite of America."
(Larry Flynt)
"Kids do the darnedest things!"
(justgoto)
"Positions shift incoherantly depending on the User. Revenge is fife for long distant pwning."
(acesspadesdice)
"I expect this to be updated DAILY or I will throw a tantrum... daily."
(soliloquy76)
"Not-so-good ways to relieve stress: jumping off a building."
(abomvubuso)
"I wish that being an atheist didn't feel like a crime."
(savagemind)
"[Real spam] doesn't happen often in political communities. - Only when Russia attacks someone."
(airiefairie)
"The last word doesn't always win."
(grandhoser)
(no subject)
Date: 26/1/09 09:40 (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 26/1/09 09:47 (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 26/1/09 10:27 (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 26/1/09 10:50 (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 26/1/09 14:58 (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 26/1/09 19:36 (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 26/1/09 16:17 (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 26/1/09 17:10 (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 26/1/09 17:03 (UTC)Okay, I'm pretty sure I've said this before, but not here. Think you got the wrong person for that one. ;)
:p
Date: 26/1/09 17:12 (UTC)http://community.livejournal.com/talk_politics/15078.html?thread=526566#t526566
Re: :p
Date: 26/1/09 17:36 (UTC)I forgot about that. :>
(no subject)
Date: 26/1/09 19:26 (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 26/1/09 20:51 (UTC)( lordtwinkie )
Fantastic!
(no subject)
Date: 27/1/09 04:36 (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 27/1/09 13:37 (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 27/1/09 13:49 (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 26/1/09 22:40 (UTC)That's the funniest one because it appears last :-)
What, no "retard"?
Date: 26/1/09 23:33 (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 27/1/09 13:35 (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 28/1/09 04:53 (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 28/1/09 09:01 (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 28/1/09 09:26 (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 28/1/09 10:23 (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 29/1/09 03:03 (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 29/1/09 07:51 (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 26/1/09 23:36 (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 27/1/09 13:35 (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 27/1/09 17:03 (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 28/1/09 04:43 (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 27/1/09 08:37 (UTC)It's all fun and games until someone gets a boner.
(no subject)
Date: 27/1/09 13:36 (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 27/1/09 15:30 (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 17/9/09 21:44 (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 16/10/09 06:02 (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 16/10/09 07:53 (UTC)All these threads are piled over by innumerable comments already.
Anyway, i tried to put links to each of them initially, but thus this post became too big and it wouldnt let me expand it beyond the 200-210th quote, and we're supposed to have 365 quotes at the end of the year :S
(no subject)
Date: 16/10/09 07:59 (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2/1/10 09:19 (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2/1/10 10:12 (UTC)A separate webpage... is a good idea!
(no subject)
Date: 2/1/10 11:07 (UTC)However, the separate webpage could easily be done. I could probably code the HTML...but then again, so could roughly 100.5% of our membership.
(no subject)
Date: 15/11/09 13:51 (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 31/12/09 16:49 (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 31/12/09 17:14 (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2/1/10 09:14 (UTC)I also think I need to come up with better one-liners.
(no subject)
Date: 2/1/10 10:11 (UTC)