Teach the Controversy!

[underlankers.livejournal.com]

Ladies and Gentlemen, it has come to my attention that the liberal media is covering up the existence of one of the most terrible, carcinogenic substances on the planet. This thing is known to exist, it has the power to literally dissolve everything (I hear the damn dirty liberal chemists even call it the universal solvent), and it's the most common substance on Planet Earth! We must act quickly against this pernicious enabler of storms and acid rain, this dreadful force that all things devours, birds, mountains, trees, flours.

Click the thing in the spoiler link if you dare!



http://www.dhmo.org/facts.html



Join me, and together we can vanquish this terrible force out to destroy the human race and even the very rocks themselves. Why do you think the liberal media is not teaching the evil influence of dihydrogen monoxide? What terrible, fiendish, Communist plots are there in the refusal to teach the truth of this dreadful substance which it is rumored makes up the majority of all life on the planet? What have they got to hide?

I'll tell you what they're hiding! They're hiding that Obama and the Esoteric Order of Dagon are behind the existence of Dihydrogen Monoxide and these rumored things called rivers, oceans, and lakes!

This is a message brought to you by Making Nonstories Inc, a subsidiary of Underlankers, Inc. You may now return to your regularly scheduled LJ programming.

Comments

[fizzyland.livejournal.com]

[awdrey-gore.livejournal.com]

I would tell you take a deep breath, but...

[gunslnger.livejournal.com]

Wrong community.

[underlankers.livejournal.com]

This is a satire of all the posts that claim things like "Well there really were conspiracies out there that are covering up very obvious events everybody sees, and if you don't believe me you're one of the sheeple who needs to respect mah autoriteh."

[gunslnger.livejournal.com]

Still the wrong community.

[jerseycajun.livejournal.com]

"Tell us some jokes!"

[htpcl.livejournal.com]

What's this new chemical and how's it going to destroy the world?

[underlankers.livejournal.com]

It's a chemical that combines hydrogen and oxygen in a form of chemical bonding that's like that of no other compound known to science. I hear it comes in three forms and can even put out fires. ;)

[htpcl.livejournal.com]

No one can extinguish wildfire!

[abomvubuso.livejournal.com]

Bah... pigshit!

[htpcl.livejournal.com]

Yeah, but the Substance burns so hot it melts wood, stone... even steel. And of course flesh.

[dexeron.livejournal.com]

[htpcl.livejournal.com]

[nairiporter.livejournal.com]

Oh, Roy Dotrice! He is awesome in the audiobooks too.

[rimpala.livejournal.com]

But lets get to the important questions like "How can you make a doomsday device out this?" and "How much money should I hold the world ransom for?"

[luzribeiro.livejournal.com]

Need moar Caesar!

OH WAIT...

[luzribeiro.livejournal.com]

That's misleading! He's a beer-thirsty beast! Burp!

[sophia-sadek.livejournal.com]

Feeding beer to a dog reminds me of the time I fed pepper jack cheese to a canada jay.

[the-rukh.livejournal.com]

Old joke is old. ;)

[rimpala.livejournal.com]

and you should feel old ;)

[allhatnocattle.livejournal.com]

It's true! My uncle's girlfriend's cousin has an engine that runs off the stuff.

[sophia-sadek.livejournal.com]

A tablespoon of the stuff in your lungs is enough to kill you.

I must disagree with you on its "most common" status. I believe there is a larger quantity of silicon dioxide on Earth.

BTW, I have pulled the stunt of looking at an ingredients list and looking aghast with the comment, "There is sodium chloride in this!"