Talk politics.

Oh no, that's too easy. He should have SWAM out to the boat from shore, with just a combat knife clenched in his teeth, climbed up on the lifeboat, broke the windows with his fist, climbed in, and knifed all three pirates. But then Rush would complain about the deaths being too gory and the wingnuts would complain about him wasting his time swimming around the ocean when he should be spending time working on cutting taxes for rich folks. Yeah!