I'm seeing a few significant parallels between your description of jewish identity (which, by the way, is apparently a lot more complicated than I even suspected; thanks for the detailed post) and some things I've seen written about the self-identity of american blacks. A shared and in many ways insular culture, a reflexive sensitivity to criticism of some aspects of that culture (and the subsequent defense by "unfair and unscrupulous" people of calling the criticism "racist"), a different (and perhaps more flexible or varying) understanding of self-referential terminology, and a corresponding lack of complete understanding of that identity by most people who aren't part of that culture. The short-form result is a fairly large stumbling block in any meaningful conversation about either of these subjects.

That's just an observation. I'm trying to decide if I can make it useful for anything.